Yes, You CAN Feel Inspired After Heartbreak, Here's How

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Table of Contents

Normal Things to Feel After a Breakup

Why Breakups Hurt So Intensely

It’s OK to Grieve

Staying Motivated as You Heal

Broken Heart Syndrome Is A Real Thing

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When a romantic relationship ends it’s totally normal to be dealing with emotional pain that seeps into the rest of your life. It’s certainly a challenging process to get through, but this too shall pass! Believe it or not, there are ways to stay motivated while you move forward with your life.

Lack of joy or excitement about things can be a common symptom ofheartbreak. So if you’re feeling uninspired, we have some suggestions that might help. There are so many places in your life to draw from for newfound inspiration, even the loss you’ve experienced.

Frequently, it’s hard to know what you’re feeling at all. It’s understandable that sadness, anger, and lack of motivation may overlap. Or you start out feeling one thing and it morphs into something else.

The most common symptoms and reactions after a breakup include:

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If you’re feelinglovesickor like you’re going through withdrawal, don’t dismiss it. Your brain can react to romantic love just as someone who deals with substance abuse reacts to drugs. While at first,cortisolsends excitement and anxiety your way, then the neurochemicaldopaminegets you happy and euphoric, similar to the reaction one gets after using cocaine or alcohol.

Bianca L. Rodriguez, LMFT

Now that you’ve broken up, you’re left without your fix. Your body and emotions have to readjust to this new normal. It’s common to feel anxiety or like your world has tilted on its side.

Others may feel great exhaustion or sadness. You might feelempty. Whatever your feelings, they are valid and yours.

After being in a close relationship, nobody could fault you for mourning the end of an important romance.Bianca L. Rodriguez, ED.M., LMFT, a licensed marriage and family therapist, reminds her patients that when they grieve the loss of a relationship they’re showing reverence for the love they shared.

Remember that you’re not trying to push aside these uncomfortable feelings and sensations. You’re facing them and dealing with them now.

Bianca L. Rodriguez, ED.M., LMFTHeartbreak and grief have a life of their own. It’s like riding the waves: sometimes they’re calm, other times turbulent and everything in between.

Bianca L. Rodriguez, ED.M., LMFT

Heartbreak and grief have a life of their own. It’s like riding the waves: sometimes they’re calm, other times turbulent and everything in between.

Here are some things to day every day to ground you and get you back to a healthy place:

As you harnessed your feelings to help in the healing process, you are ready to move forward. That can be in a myriad of ways:

When you’re physically wounded, the same region of the brain is stimulated as when you’re emotionally wounded. So, it makes sense why that feeling of pain and rejection seems like it’s living in your body.

Some people recovering from the loss of a romantic partner get very stressed and it affects their heart. They get shortness of breath, pain in their chest and feel like they’re having a heart attack. Their heart muscles truly weaken.

This is called “broken heart syndrome.” It’s also known asstress-induced cardiomyopathyor takotsubo cardiomyopathy.About 90% of those who suffer from stress induced cardiomyopathy are women.

Researchers reviewed 235,463 documented cases of broken heart syndrome reported on between 2006 and 2017. Based on the studyscientists found a significant increase of broken heart syndrome among middle‐aged to older women (ages 50 to 74).

Dealing With Depression After a Breakup

If you think you might be depressed, seek help

The most common feeling after a breakup is that of sadness. But after heartbreak, many arenot sure if they’re grieving or depressed.

It’s OK to feel depressed as you work your way through the heartbreak. When people experience a stressful life event, depression may be likely to follow.

Seek out a therapistonline or in person, who can prescribe psychotherapy or a form of medication to help you get through it.

The good news is this condition is reversible. Most people are easily treated and recover in a matter of weeks.

If you’ve tried all of these tips and find that you’re still having a hard time healing, it might be helpful to talk to a therapist. Sometimes the middle is messy and your emotions might not follow a straight line. You might feel better one day and go backwards the next. Again, it’s all OK.

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4 SourcesVerywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.The Cleveland Clinic.Broken Heart Syndrome.Harvard Health Publishing.Takosubo cardiomyopathy (broken-heart syndrome). Published January 29, 2020.Pattisapu VK, Hao H, Liu Y, et al.Sex- and Age-Based Temporal Trends in Takotsubo Syndrome Incidence in the United States.J Am Heart Assoc. 2021;10(20):e019583. doi:10.1161/JAHA.120.019583Verhallen AM, Renken RJ, Marsman JC, Ter Horst GJ.Romantic relationship breakup: An experimental model to study effects of stress on depression (-like) symptoms.PLoS One. 2019;14(5):e0217320. Published 2019 May 31. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0217320

4 Sources

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.The Cleveland Clinic.Broken Heart Syndrome.Harvard Health Publishing.Takosubo cardiomyopathy (broken-heart syndrome). Published January 29, 2020.Pattisapu VK, Hao H, Liu Y, et al.Sex- and Age-Based Temporal Trends in Takotsubo Syndrome Incidence in the United States.J Am Heart Assoc. 2021;10(20):e019583. doi:10.1161/JAHA.120.019583Verhallen AM, Renken RJ, Marsman JC, Ter Horst GJ.Romantic relationship breakup: An experimental model to study effects of stress on depression (-like) symptoms.PLoS One. 2019;14(5):e0217320. Published 2019 May 31. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0217320

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.

The Cleveland Clinic.Broken Heart Syndrome.Harvard Health Publishing.Takosubo cardiomyopathy (broken-heart syndrome). Published January 29, 2020.Pattisapu VK, Hao H, Liu Y, et al.Sex- and Age-Based Temporal Trends in Takotsubo Syndrome Incidence in the United States.J Am Heart Assoc. 2021;10(20):e019583. doi:10.1161/JAHA.120.019583Verhallen AM, Renken RJ, Marsman JC, Ter Horst GJ.Romantic relationship breakup: An experimental model to study effects of stress on depression (-like) symptoms.PLoS One. 2019;14(5):e0217320. Published 2019 May 31. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0217320

The Cleveland Clinic.Broken Heart Syndrome.

Harvard Health Publishing.Takosubo cardiomyopathy (broken-heart syndrome). Published January 29, 2020.

Pattisapu VK, Hao H, Liu Y, et al.Sex- and Age-Based Temporal Trends in Takotsubo Syndrome Incidence in the United States.J Am Heart Assoc. 2021;10(20):e019583. doi:10.1161/JAHA.120.019583

Verhallen AM, Renken RJ, Marsman JC, Ter Horst GJ.Romantic relationship breakup: An experimental model to study effects of stress on depression (-like) symptoms.PLoS One. 2019;14(5):e0217320. Published 2019 May 31. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0217320

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