Why Do You Talk to Yourself?

Table of ContentsView AllTable of ContentsReasonsTypes of Self-TalkBenefitsUsesHow to Control ItWhen to Be Concerned

Table of ContentsView All

View All

Table of Contents

Reasons

Types of Self-Talk

Benefits

Uses

How to Control It

When to Be Concerned

Close

People talk to themselves for various reasons, includingproblem-solving, reasoning, planning,motivation, and attention.Self-talk is common, and experts believe talking to yourself outloud can help you process your thoughts in a healthy, productive way.

Self-talk can also be related to problems like stress, anxiety, or trauma. If you’re experiencing other symptoms like difficulty sleeping or feelings of intense sadness, it’s best to see a mental health care professional.

It is normal to talk to yourself. While there are times it might pose problems or be a sign of a mental health condition, in most cases, you can go ahead and talk to yourself without it being a cause for worry.

This article discusses some of the reasons why people talk to themselves and some of the possible benefits of this behavior. It also covers what you can do if you’d like to stop talking to yourself and some of the signs that it might be a cause for concern.

Does Everyone Have an Inner Monologue?

Why Do People Talk to Themselves?

Most people have an inner monolouge, but many people also engage in external self-talk. Almost everyone talks outloud to themselves at least occasionally, but some do it more often than others.

While external self-talk is relatively common, there has not been a great deal of research into why some people talk to themselves out loud and others don’t. A 2019 article published in the journalFrontiers in Psychologyexplored a couple of different explanations.

Social Isolation

One theory suggests that people who spend moretime alonemay be more likely to talk to themselves. Because they have fewer interactions with others, their self-talk may serve as a form of social communication.

There is a fair amount of research supporting this theory. Studies have shown that adults who were an only-child are more likely to engage in external self-talk.

Cognitive Disruption

For example, one study found that people tend to talk to themselves more when preparing to give a speech if they are anxious about public speaking.

The study also demonstrated the impact of positive and negative self-talk. Those who talked to themselves in a negative or self-critical way were more likely to experience increased public speaking anxiety.

Loneliness: Causes and Health Consequences

There are a few different types of ways that you might talk to yourself. Self-talk tends to be either positive or negative, but it can also differ in terms of its intended purpose.

Studies suggest that talking to yourself in a positive, instructional, or motivational way can help improve your performance.

Surprisingly, researchers have found that negative self-talk doesn’t always impair performance. On the contrary, sometimes it can provide helpful and realistic feedback that can help you improve how you do in the future. Too muchnegative self-talk, however, can undermine your confidence in the long run, so it is important to avoid making it a habit.

Benefits of Talking to Yourself

Talking to yourself can have a number of benefits. Some of these include:

Reflection

Talking to yourself can be a useful way to gain some distance from your own experiences. It allows you to reflect on the things that are happening in your life. By providing you some distance, it can be a great way to see things more objectively.

It can minimize the immediate emotion and knee-jerk feelings you might have in the moment so that you can see things in a clearer, more rational way.

Motivation

One study in athletes found that self-talk not only helped them perform better, it also seemed related to how much fun they had playing the game.

Better Memory

If you’ve ever talked to yourself as you roam the aisles of the grocery store, don’t fret—research has shown it might actually help you better remember the items on your list.

In one older study, participants had to search for items in a store without saying anything.During the second phase of the experiment, the participants were told to repeat the names of the items they were looking for as they searched. The results showed that those who talked to themselves found it easier to find what they were looking for.

Problem-Solving

Talking to yourself can also be a way to work through problems you might be facing. This tactic, known as self-explaining, can help people monitor their progress and improve their performance as they work through a problem.

Spending a few moments talking to yourself can give you the time you need to really focus and reflect on the problem and all of your options.

Getting the Most Out of Self-Talk

Talking to yourself can clearly have benefits, but there are also things that you can do to make sure you are getting the most out of your self-talk. Strategies that can help are listed below.

Keep It Positive

Negative self-talk, whether it’s in your mind or out loud, can have a seriously detrimental impact on your well-being. If you tend to dwell or ruminate on negativity, finding ways toreframe your wordscan be beneficial.

This doesn’t mean saying things that are overly positive or unrealistic. For example, you don’t want to replace a negative statement such as “I’m terrible at this” with “I’m the best at this.”

Instead, focus on making positive but realistic statements that foster a more optimisticmindset. For example, you might say “This is hard but you are learning. You’re getting better every day.”

Ask Questions

Asking yourself questions about what you have learned or what something means can be a powerful tool for improving memory. Because you are essentially learning something and then teaching it to yourself, it helps reinforce the information and cement it inlong-term memorymore effectively.

Tune In to What You’re Saying

Talking to yourself is most beneficial when you actually pay attention and listen to what you are saying.

While you might sometimes simply narrate what’s happening in a more stream-of-consciousness manner without really paying attention to the content of your words, listening and thinking about your self-talk can be a helpful way to gain greaterself-awareness.

Use the Second or Third Person

Instead of talking to yourself in the first person, try switching to a second (“you”) or even third-person (“she/he/they”) perspective.

In one study, researchers found that when people talked to themselves in the third person, they were able to better regulate their own emotions.This can be particularly helpful if you are dealing with difficult or stressful feelings.

Using the third person can help give you some distance from those feelings, which can help you evaluate them more objectively, almost as if you were observing someone else’s thoughts rather than your own.

How you talk to yourself can have an important impact on yourself-esteem, learning, and self-awareness. Treating yourself with kindness, asking yourself questions, and paying attention to your words can help you make the most of your self-talk.

There’s usually nothing wrong with talking to yourself, but that doesn’t mean that there aren’t times when you want to keep your thoughts to yourself instead of verbalizing them. For example, others might find your self-talk disruptive, particularly if you are sharing a workspace with other people.

So what can you do to manage your tendency to talk to yourself? Some strategies that can help include:

Self-talk isn’t always a positive force. If you are engaging in negative self-talk, it can take a toll on your confidence, self-esteem, and mental well-being.

Sometimes you might find yourself engaging in self-talk centered onrumination, or continuously talking about the same sad, negative, dark thoughts. This type of self-talk may be a sign of a mental health condition.

Mental Health Conditions Associated With Self-Talk

Certain mental health conditions can make you more likely to engage in negative self-talk. These include:

Self-talk can also be a concern if it occurs as a result ofhallucinations. In this case, a person would talk aloud to a non-existent external source rather than engaging in a conversation with themselves.

Hallucinations may be connected to a number of different conditions including:

When to See a Mental Health Professional

A doctor or therapist can help determine if you might have a mental health condition and recommend appropriate treatments. They can also help you learn to manage the behavior and avoid negative self-talk.

A Word From Verywell

While talking to yourself is sometimes viewed as eccentric, quirky, or even pathological, it is important to remember that it is actually incredibly common. Not only that, it can have a number of important benefits includingregulating emotionsand improving memory.

So go ahead and talk to yourself when you’re walking down the aisles of the grocery store or preparing yourself to give a big speech. While it might seem silly, it actually works.

6 SourcesVerywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.Brinthaupt TM.Individual differences in self-talk frequency: social isolation and cognitive disruption.Front Psychol. 2019;10:1088. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2019.01088Latinjak AT, Morin A, Brinthaupt TM, et al.Self-talk: An interdisciplinary review and transdisciplinary model.Rev Gen Psychol. 2023;0(0):1–32. doi:10.1177/10892680231170263Shi X, Brinthaupt TM, McCree M.The relationship of self-talk frequency to communication apprehension and public speaking anxiety.Pers Individ Differ.2015;75:125-129. doi:10.1016/j.paid.2014.11.023Park SH, Lim BS, Lim ST.The effects of self-talk on shooting athletes' motivation.J Sports Sci Med. 2020;19(3):517-521Lupyan G, Swingley D.Self-directed speech affects visual search performance.Quarterly Journal of Experimental Psychology. 2012;65(6):1068-1085. doi:10.1080/17470218.2011.647039Moser JS, Dougherty A, Mattson WI, et al.Third-person self-talk facilitates emotion regulation without engaging cognitive control: Converging evidence from ERP and fMRI.Sci Rep. 2017;7(1):4519. doi:10.1038/s41598-017-04047-3

6 Sources

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.Brinthaupt TM.Individual differences in self-talk frequency: social isolation and cognitive disruption.Front Psychol. 2019;10:1088. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2019.01088Latinjak AT, Morin A, Brinthaupt TM, et al.Self-talk: An interdisciplinary review and transdisciplinary model.Rev Gen Psychol. 2023;0(0):1–32. doi:10.1177/10892680231170263Shi X, Brinthaupt TM, McCree M.The relationship of self-talk frequency to communication apprehension and public speaking anxiety.Pers Individ Differ.2015;75:125-129. doi:10.1016/j.paid.2014.11.023Park SH, Lim BS, Lim ST.The effects of self-talk on shooting athletes' motivation.J Sports Sci Med. 2020;19(3):517-521Lupyan G, Swingley D.Self-directed speech affects visual search performance.Quarterly Journal of Experimental Psychology. 2012;65(6):1068-1085. doi:10.1080/17470218.2011.647039Moser JS, Dougherty A, Mattson WI, et al.Third-person self-talk facilitates emotion regulation without engaging cognitive control: Converging evidence from ERP and fMRI.Sci Rep. 2017;7(1):4519. doi:10.1038/s41598-017-04047-3

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.

Brinthaupt TM.Individual differences in self-talk frequency: social isolation and cognitive disruption.Front Psychol. 2019;10:1088. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2019.01088Latinjak AT, Morin A, Brinthaupt TM, et al.Self-talk: An interdisciplinary review and transdisciplinary model.Rev Gen Psychol. 2023;0(0):1–32. doi:10.1177/10892680231170263Shi X, Brinthaupt TM, McCree M.The relationship of self-talk frequency to communication apprehension and public speaking anxiety.Pers Individ Differ.2015;75:125-129. doi:10.1016/j.paid.2014.11.023Park SH, Lim BS, Lim ST.The effects of self-talk on shooting athletes' motivation.J Sports Sci Med. 2020;19(3):517-521Lupyan G, Swingley D.Self-directed speech affects visual search performance.Quarterly Journal of Experimental Psychology. 2012;65(6):1068-1085. doi:10.1080/17470218.2011.647039Moser JS, Dougherty A, Mattson WI, et al.Third-person self-talk facilitates emotion regulation without engaging cognitive control: Converging evidence from ERP and fMRI.Sci Rep. 2017;7(1):4519. doi:10.1038/s41598-017-04047-3

Brinthaupt TM.Individual differences in self-talk frequency: social isolation and cognitive disruption.Front Psychol. 2019;10:1088. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2019.01088

Latinjak AT, Morin A, Brinthaupt TM, et al.Self-talk: An interdisciplinary review and transdisciplinary model.Rev Gen Psychol. 2023;0(0):1–32. doi:10.1177/10892680231170263

Shi X, Brinthaupt TM, McCree M.The relationship of self-talk frequency to communication apprehension and public speaking anxiety.Pers Individ Differ.2015;75:125-129. doi:10.1016/j.paid.2014.11.023

Park SH, Lim BS, Lim ST.The effects of self-talk on shooting athletes' motivation.J Sports Sci Med. 2020;19(3):517-521

Lupyan G, Swingley D.Self-directed speech affects visual search performance.Quarterly Journal of Experimental Psychology. 2012;65(6):1068-1085. doi:10.1080/17470218.2011.647039

Moser JS, Dougherty A, Mattson WI, et al.Third-person self-talk facilitates emotion regulation without engaging cognitive control: Converging evidence from ERP and fMRI.Sci Rep. 2017;7(1):4519. doi:10.1038/s41598-017-04047-3

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