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Mental Health HomepageConditions LibraryConditions CategoryConditions CategoryWhy Do Some of us Perform Better Under Pressure?
Table of Contents:OverviewEveryone’s Experience is UniqueThe Role of Survival ResponsesThe Benefits of Staying PresentSelf-Compassion and Overcoming the Fear of Failure
Anxiety DisorderRead Time: 5 Minutes
Published On: June 12, 2020
Reviewed On: June 12, 2020
Updated On: October 27, 2023
OverviewI am my worst critic. I always blame myself for bombing a presentation, screwing up a business pitch, or making a fool of myself in one way or another. People used to tell me that I needed to build my confidence to do better under pressure. I’ve come to realize, however, that my self-criticism has more to do with myperceptionof my performance than the performance itself. More often than not, I perform absolutely fine.So, what exactly does it mean to perform well under pressure? How do we excel when all eyes are upon us and how do we recognize when we succeed? To better understand the answers to these questions, I consulted an expert, Talkspace therapistElizabeth Hinkle, LMFT.
Overview
I am my worst critic. I always blame myself for bombing a presentation, screwing up a business pitch, or making a fool of myself in one way or another. People used to tell me that I needed to build my confidence to do better under pressure. I’ve come to realize, however, that my self-criticism has more to do with myperceptionof my performance than the performance itself. More often than not, I perform absolutely fine.
So, what exactly does it mean to perform well under pressure? How do we excel when all eyes are upon us and how do we recognize when we succeed? To better understand the answers to these questions, I consulted an expert, Talkspace therapistElizabeth Hinkle, LMFT.
Everyone’s Experience is Unique
The Role of Survival Responses
The fight-flight-freeze response is something, as mammals, we all have. It’s our instinctual, survival-based reaction to threat. Each person’s response varies based on what kind oftraumathey may have experienced in the past.
Unsurprisingly, Hinkle confirmed that past trauma can create a strong reaction to freeze under pressure. A freeze response is exactly what its name suggests: freezing when you feel scared. In the workplace, this can be exhibited as confusion, becoming overwhelmed, or getting tongue-tied. “Knowing yourself and your typical response to stress is key in helping yourself through a high-pressure situation,” said Hinkle.
The importance of nervous system regulation
Hinkle agrees that nervous system regulation is a useful life skill, a skill that takes patience and practice to develop. She suggests starting out with a simple breathing exercise. Since it’s common to start breathing faster and more shallowly in times of stress and pressure, learning to become conscious of your breath can be extremely helpful. “Set your intention to practice long, slow, deep breaths on a regular basis,” recommended Hinkle. “The more you practice, the more naturally this will come to you in times of stress.”
The Benefits of Staying PresentEven though I onlymeditatefor about five to ten minutes a day, I’ve found it to be helpful with performing well under pressure because it helps me to stay in the present moment. Hinkle suggestsmindfulnessas a tool when under pressure. It helps with managing expectations.She reiterates thatmindfulness is something you can practiceanytime, even with routine activities. For example, she suggests practicing mindfulness while washing your dishes. “Just focus on the dishes: how the water feels, how the dish feels in your hands, the way the soap smells,” she explained. “Watch the process of cleaning and practice observing and describing what you see.“ When you practice mindfulness with everyday tasks, you will be equipped to bring these skills to unexpected, stressful situations.
The Benefits of Staying Present
Even though I onlymeditatefor about five to ten minutes a day, I’ve found it to be helpful with performing well under pressure because it helps me to stay in the present moment. Hinkle suggestsmindfulnessas a tool when under pressure. It helps with managing expectations.
She reiterates thatmindfulness is something you can practiceanytime, even with routine activities. For example, she suggests practicing mindfulness while washing your dishes. “Just focus on the dishes: how the water feels, how the dish feels in your hands, the way the soap smells,” she explained. “Watch the process of cleaning and practice observing and describing what you see.“ When you practice mindfulness with everyday tasks, you will be equipped to bring these skills to unexpected, stressful situations.
Self-Compassion and Overcoming the Fear of FailureIt’s hard to stay calm under pressure when you set impossible standards for yourself. I’ve been a perfectionist for most of my life and was never taught the importance of failing. I was taught that failure made you look weak and underprepared and that you should do everything in your power to avoid it. If you’re afraid of failure, however, it’s highly likely that you will clam up under pressure. But why?Because failing is part of the learning process. If you are trying to avoid failure, you may wind up feeling even more stressed about an already stressful situation. If you can learn to embrace failure and view stressful situations as opportunities to grow, however, you might not dread them so much. You might even look forward to them as a way to challenge yourself personally and professionally. One of the best ways to learn how to embrace failure is to practice self-compassion. “Knowing that you’re doing your best and giving yourself credit for showing up helps you to stay more relaxed,” explained Hinkle, “which in turn improves your performance in the moment.”When you are used to being hard on yourself, it can feel like you never do well under pressure. It is important to consider, though, whether youtrulydon’t perform well under pressure or you just psych yourself out. Sometimes it’s as simple as switching your inner dialogue from, “I’m scared about how this is going to turn out,” to “I’ve got this — I’m going to focus on the here and now and do my best.”That’s the most we can ever do — our best.
Self-Compassion and Overcoming the Fear of Failure
It’s hard to stay calm under pressure when you set impossible standards for yourself. I’ve been a perfectionist for most of my life and was never taught the importance of failing. I was taught that failure made you look weak and underprepared and that you should do everything in your power to avoid it. If you’re afraid of failure, however, it’s highly likely that you will clam up under pressure. But why?
Because failing is part of the learning process. If you are trying to avoid failure, you may wind up feeling even more stressed about an already stressful situation. If you can learn to embrace failure and view stressful situations as opportunities to grow, however, you might not dread them so much. You might even look forward to them as a way to challenge yourself personally and professionally. One of the best ways to learn how to embrace failure is to practice self-compassion. “Knowing that you’re doing your best and giving yourself credit for showing up helps you to stay more relaxed,” explained Hinkle, “which in turn improves your performance in the moment.”
When you are used to being hard on yourself, it can feel like you never do well under pressure. It is important to consider, though, whether youtrulydon’t perform well under pressure or you just psych yourself out. Sometimes it’s as simple as switching your inner dialogue from, “I’m scared about how this is going to turn out,” to “I’ve got this — I’m going to focus on the here and now and do my best.”
That’s the most we can ever do — our best.
Elizabeth SuElizabeth is a mentor, mindfulness teacher, and Founder of Monday Vibes™, a weekly inspirational newsletter and digital self-care package, that helps women all over the world find their own version of happiness. With an ethos of school meets summer camp, everything she creates leverages her three areas of expertise: psychology (Masters from Columbia University), business (former Silicon Valley career), and wellness (certified yoga teacher and life coach). She has been featured in numerous media outlets for her knowledge on overcoming burnout, cultivating self-compassion, and the science of happy workplaces.
Elizabeth is a mentor, mindfulness teacher, and Founder of Monday Vibes™, a weekly inspirational newsletter and digital self-care package, that helps women all over the world find their own version of happiness. With an ethos of school meets summer camp, everything she creates leverages her three areas of expertise: psychology (Masters from Columbia University), business (former Silicon Valley career), and wellness (certified yoga teacher and life coach). She has been featured in numerous media outlets for her knowledge on overcoming burnout, cultivating self-compassion, and the science of happy workplaces.
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