What to Know About Bereavement Counseling and Therapy

Table of ContentsView AllTable of ContentsTechniquesTypesBenefitsWhat to ExpectWho Can It HelpHow to Find a Therapist

Table of ContentsView All

View All

Table of Contents

Techniques

Types

Benefits

What to Expect

Who Can It Help

How to Find a Therapist

Close

Bereavementcounseling or therapy, also known asgrief counseling, refers to therapy offered to those who have suffered the loss of a loved one and are going through the grieving process.

The process of grieving can involve a host of different emotions including sadness, anger, guilt, and regret, and it can be helpful to have a professional there with you through the stages of this process.

A bereavement therapist can help with things like adapting to life without your loved one, working through guilt about things you wish had gone differently, and sharing feelings that you otherwise might not have anyone with whom to share.

The process of grief can be a confusing time; the goal of bereavement therapy is to help you cope and make sense of it all.

This article discusses how bereavement therapy works and the benefits of this type of treatment. It also covers different types of bereavement counseling you might encounter and how to find a bereavement therapist.

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If you are consideringbereavement counseling, you might be wondering what to expect. Below are some of the different aspects of bereavement counseling that you may work through with your therapist, to help you better understand the process.

Getting in Touch With Your Feelings

A bereavement therapist can help you to get in touch with your emotions and express them in a safe space. Having a therapist can be particularly helpful if you don’t have anyone to talk with or don’t feel comfortable expressing those feelings to friends or family.

A therapist can listen without offering advice and help you to feel as though yourfeelings are valid.

Accepting the Loss

Working Through Trauma

If you witnessed your loved one’s death or there was some othertraumatic aspectof the loss, bereavement counseling can help you to process the trauma.

During therapy, you would describe what you witnessed, discuss how it made you feel, and learn how to move forward with the support of your therapist. It can be helpful to process trauma in the presence of a therapist who can offer empathy and support.

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Working Through Guilt

If you havefeelings of guiltabout things that you should have done or how things could have gone differently, then a bereavement therapist can help you to work through these feelings.

A therapist could help you to see that living your best life is more important than holding onto guilt about things that you can’t change.

Dealing With Daily Life

If your daily life is in upheaval because you lost someone who was there with you every day, then a bereavement therapist can help you to reorganize your life and find new ways to function to address these issues.

For example, if your lost your spouse and it was your spouse who managed the budget or did all of the cooking or cleaning, then you will need to find a new way to get those things done. A therapist can help you to make these plans.

Building a Support System

Building a support system is particularly important if you don’t know where to turn for help or aren’t sure what support services are available to you.

Making Funeral Arrangements

If your loss is fairly recent, your bereavement therapist might also be able to help you think through the process of making funeral arrangements. Having support during this process can help make sure that your loved one is remembered in a way that feels right to you at a time when you might not be able to think clearly or make decisions easily.

If a loss is imminent, you might also have the opportunity to begin the therapy process prior to the actual death.

Checking for Depression

Grief can play a role in triggering the onset of depression. A bereavement therapist will also ask you questions to determine whether you might be living with potentially treatable symptoms of a depressive disorder.

Depression may also sometimes be a symptom of complicated grief, a condition that occurs in about 10% of all bereaved people.

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Journaling and Writing Exercises

Your therapist may also guide you through writing exercises such as writing a letter to your deceased loved one to tell them how you feel about losing them or what your life is like now that they are gone.

In one study looking at the effect of a writing treatment for traumatic bereavement, the results suggested that writing was an effective intervention for bereaved children and teens.

Book Recommendations

A bereavement therapist can also recommend books to read about the grieving process so that you can learn about what to expect, get validation, and confirm that your feelings are normal.

For example, you might receive a recommendation to read a book about moving past guilt if this is the specific issue that you are dealing with.

Art Therapy

Some bereavement therapists also practiceart therapy. Art therapy for grief might include creating a memory book, doing a craft project, or making other art to remember your loved one.

A 2018 study found that the use of visual art treatment strategies was associated with positive changes in bereaved adults. Art therapy was linked to helping people feel a stronger bond to their deceased loved one and find meaning in the experience.

Art therapy is also a way to practice soothing yourself, which can be helpful if you are also experiencing anxiety after the loss of your loved one.

Unresolved Issues

Do you feel as though you have unresolved issues related to your loved one’s death? For example, perhaps you were in the middle of an argument at the point of their death.

Bereavement therapy can provide you with the chance to resolve these issues through exercises such as the empty chair technique and other role-playing scenarios.

Remembrance Rituals

A grief therapist could also help you to arrange “remembrance rituals” as a way of honoring your loved one. They may help you devise a specific activity (e.g., an art therapy project) or set aside a particular time of the month or year when you will spend time remembering.

Recap

Types of Bereavement Therapy

Complicated grief therapy is a specific type of bereavement counseling aimed at those experiencing complicated grief.

This type of therapy is based on other techniques such ascognitive behavioral therapy (CBT),interpersonal therapy (IPT), andattachment theory.

Some of the specific techniques used in complicated grief therapy include telling the story of the death, separating grief from trauma, organizing grief, dealing with guilt, and honoring your loved one.

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Benefits of Bereavement Therapy

There are a number of benefits associated with bereavement therapy. Below are some reasons to consider this type of therapy if you are struggling with your grief:

A 2017 study found that bereavement counseling was linked to long-term beneficial effects and reductions in symptoms of grief.

What Happens During Bereavement Therapy

During bereavement therapy, you can expect to be involved in some or any of the following therapeutic exercises. Your therapist might also guide you through others depending on your specific situation.

Who Will Benefit Most From Bereavement Therapy?

You might be a particularly good candidate for bereavement counseling if any of the following are true for you:

How to Find Bereavement Therapy

If you are in the middle of grieving, you might not be thinking clearly. It may be helpful to enlist someone close to you to help you look for bereavement therapists in your area or make an appointment with your family doctor to ask for a referral.

You may also wish to access a bereavement support group in place of or in addition to therapy if you would like to talk with other people who have been through the same things as you.

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A Word From Verywell

Are you struggling to get over the death of a loved one? If so, you might want to consider bereavement therapy.

This form of therapy is ideal for anyone experiencing grief related to the loss of a loved one. While it isn’t necessary to enter therapy right away, the sooner you get help in facing the challenging emotions involved in grief, the better you will be in the long run.

It’s also important to remember that wanting to “feel better” might bring up some feelings of guilt. However, this is all part of the grieving process and something that a therapist can help you with.

Get Help NowWe’ve tried, tested, and written unbiased reviews of thebest online therapy programsincluding Talkspace, BetterHelp, and ReGain. Find out which option is the best for you.

Get Help Now

We’ve tried, tested, and written unbiased reviews of thebest online therapy programsincluding Talkspace, BetterHelp, and ReGain. Find out which option is the best for you.

9 SourcesVerywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.Simon NM.Treating complicated grief.JAMA. 2013;310(4):416-423. doi:10.1001/jama.2013.8614Stroebe M, Stroebe W, van de Schoot R, Schut H, Abakoumkin G, Li J.Guilt in bereavement: the role of self-blame and regret in coping with loss.PLoS One. 2014;9(5):e96606. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0096606Nordal KC.Grief: Coping with the loss of your loved one. American Psychological Association.Thiemann P, Street AN, Heath SE, Quince T, Kuhn I, Barclay S.Prolonged grief disorder prevalence in adults 65 years and over: A systematic review.BMJ Support Palliat Care. 2021. doi:10.1136/bmjspcare-2020-002845Kalantari M, Yule W, Dyregrov A, Neshatdoost H, Ahmadi SJ.Efficacy of writing for recovery on traumatic grief symptoms of Afghani refugee bereaved adolescents: A randomized control trial.Omega(Westport). 2012;65(2):139-50. doi: 10.2190/OM.65.2.d.Weiskittle RE, Gramling SE.The therapeutic effectiveness of using visual art modalities with the bereaved: A systematic review.Psychol Res Behav Manag. 2018;11:9-24. doi:10.2147/PRBM.S131993Hagl M, Powell S, Rosner R, Butollo W.Dialogical exposure with traumatically bereaved Bosnian women: Findings from a controlled trial.Clin Psychol Psychother. 2015;22(6):604-18. doi:10.1002/cpp.1921Wetherell JL.Complicated grief therapy as a new treatment approach.Dialogues Clin Neurosci. 2012;14(2):159-166. doi:10.31887/DCNS.2012.14.2/jwetherellNewsom C, Schut H, Stroebe MS, et al.Effectiveness of bereavement counselling through a community-based organization: A naturalistic, controlled trial.Clin Psychol Psychother. 2017;24(6):O1512-O1523. doi:10.1002/cpp.2113

9 Sources

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.Simon NM.Treating complicated grief.JAMA. 2013;310(4):416-423. doi:10.1001/jama.2013.8614Stroebe M, Stroebe W, van de Schoot R, Schut H, Abakoumkin G, Li J.Guilt in bereavement: the role of self-blame and regret in coping with loss.PLoS One. 2014;9(5):e96606. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0096606Nordal KC.Grief: Coping with the loss of your loved one. American Psychological Association.Thiemann P, Street AN, Heath SE, Quince T, Kuhn I, Barclay S.Prolonged grief disorder prevalence in adults 65 years and over: A systematic review.BMJ Support Palliat Care. 2021. doi:10.1136/bmjspcare-2020-002845Kalantari M, Yule W, Dyregrov A, Neshatdoost H, Ahmadi SJ.Efficacy of writing for recovery on traumatic grief symptoms of Afghani refugee bereaved adolescents: A randomized control trial.Omega(Westport). 2012;65(2):139-50. doi: 10.2190/OM.65.2.d.Weiskittle RE, Gramling SE.The therapeutic effectiveness of using visual art modalities with the bereaved: A systematic review.Psychol Res Behav Manag. 2018;11:9-24. doi:10.2147/PRBM.S131993Hagl M, Powell S, Rosner R, Butollo W.Dialogical exposure with traumatically bereaved Bosnian women: Findings from a controlled trial.Clin Psychol Psychother. 2015;22(6):604-18. doi:10.1002/cpp.1921Wetherell JL.Complicated grief therapy as a new treatment approach.Dialogues Clin Neurosci. 2012;14(2):159-166. doi:10.31887/DCNS.2012.14.2/jwetherellNewsom C, Schut H, Stroebe MS, et al.Effectiveness of bereavement counselling through a community-based organization: A naturalistic, controlled trial.Clin Psychol Psychother. 2017;24(6):O1512-O1523. doi:10.1002/cpp.2113

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.

Simon NM.Treating complicated grief.JAMA. 2013;310(4):416-423. doi:10.1001/jama.2013.8614Stroebe M, Stroebe W, van de Schoot R, Schut H, Abakoumkin G, Li J.Guilt in bereavement: the role of self-blame and regret in coping with loss.PLoS One. 2014;9(5):e96606. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0096606Nordal KC.Grief: Coping with the loss of your loved one. American Psychological Association.Thiemann P, Street AN, Heath SE, Quince T, Kuhn I, Barclay S.Prolonged grief disorder prevalence in adults 65 years and over: A systematic review.BMJ Support Palliat Care. 2021. doi:10.1136/bmjspcare-2020-002845Kalantari M, Yule W, Dyregrov A, Neshatdoost H, Ahmadi SJ.Efficacy of writing for recovery on traumatic grief symptoms of Afghani refugee bereaved adolescents: A randomized control trial.Omega(Westport). 2012;65(2):139-50. doi: 10.2190/OM.65.2.d.Weiskittle RE, Gramling SE.The therapeutic effectiveness of using visual art modalities with the bereaved: A systematic review.Psychol Res Behav Manag. 2018;11:9-24. doi:10.2147/PRBM.S131993Hagl M, Powell S, Rosner R, Butollo W.Dialogical exposure with traumatically bereaved Bosnian women: Findings from a controlled trial.Clin Psychol Psychother. 2015;22(6):604-18. doi:10.1002/cpp.1921Wetherell JL.Complicated grief therapy as a new treatment approach.Dialogues Clin Neurosci. 2012;14(2):159-166. doi:10.31887/DCNS.2012.14.2/jwetherellNewsom C, Schut H, Stroebe MS, et al.Effectiveness of bereavement counselling through a community-based organization: A naturalistic, controlled trial.Clin Psychol Psychother. 2017;24(6):O1512-O1523. doi:10.1002/cpp.2113

Simon NM.Treating complicated grief.JAMA. 2013;310(4):416-423. doi:10.1001/jama.2013.8614

Stroebe M, Stroebe W, van de Schoot R, Schut H, Abakoumkin G, Li J.Guilt in bereavement: the role of self-blame and regret in coping with loss.PLoS One. 2014;9(5):e96606. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0096606

Nordal KC.Grief: Coping with the loss of your loved one. American Psychological Association.

Thiemann P, Street AN, Heath SE, Quince T, Kuhn I, Barclay S.Prolonged grief disorder prevalence in adults 65 years and over: A systematic review.BMJ Support Palliat Care. 2021. doi:10.1136/bmjspcare-2020-002845

Kalantari M, Yule W, Dyregrov A, Neshatdoost H, Ahmadi SJ.Efficacy of writing for recovery on traumatic grief symptoms of Afghani refugee bereaved adolescents: A randomized control trial.Omega(Westport). 2012;65(2):139-50. doi: 10.2190/OM.65.2.d.

Weiskittle RE, Gramling SE.The therapeutic effectiveness of using visual art modalities with the bereaved: A systematic review.Psychol Res Behav Manag. 2018;11:9-24. doi:10.2147/PRBM.S131993

Hagl M, Powell S, Rosner R, Butollo W.Dialogical exposure with traumatically bereaved Bosnian women: Findings from a controlled trial.Clin Psychol Psychother. 2015;22(6):604-18. doi:10.1002/cpp.1921

Wetherell JL.Complicated grief therapy as a new treatment approach.Dialogues Clin Neurosci. 2012;14(2):159-166. doi:10.31887/DCNS.2012.14.2/jwetherell

Newsom C, Schut H, Stroebe MS, et al.Effectiveness of bereavement counselling through a community-based organization: A naturalistic, controlled trial.Clin Psychol Psychother. 2017;24(6):O1512-O1523. doi:10.1002/cpp.2113

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