Table of ContentsView AllTable of ContentsHealth BenefitsNon-Physical Ways to IncreasePhysical Ways to IncreaseGetting Help

Table of ContentsView All

View All

Table of Contents

Health Benefits

Non-Physical Ways to Increase

Physical Ways to Increase

Getting Help

Close

When two people feel close and connected, their participation in sexual acts can be deemed as intimate sex. Whilecasual sex(which doesn’t involve future expectations or a romantic, emotional commitment) has merit, adding intimacy can improve a person’s sexual experience.

Here we explore the many benefits of being intimate with a partner sexually, along with both non-physical and physical ways to create more intimate sex. We also discuss help available for individuals and couples who seek greater sexual intimacy in their relationships.

Benefits of Intimate Sex

Being involved in an intimate romantic relationship has been linked to several benefits, some of which include:

A higher level of intimacy in romantic, long-term relationships is also associated with more sexual desire which, in turn, raises the odds that more sexual activity will occur.

Non-Physical Ways to Increase Sexual Intimacy

Achieving sexually intimate experiences starts outside the bedroom. Here are a few non-sexual ways to boost sexual intimacy with a partner.

Make Time to Be Together

Make It Okay to Enjoy Sex

Sometimes we have to remind ourselves that it’s okay to want sexual pleasure. This reminder can help us initiate sex more frequently, andhaving more sexwith our significant other can make our bond stronger—potentially even contributing to a longer relationship.

Communicate Openly

If the goal is more intimate sex, it’s also helpful totruly listen to our partner.  Some people need intimacy before becoming sexual while others want sex before they can become intimate. Misunderstandings can ensue if we don’t talk to our partners to understand their needs.

Keeping an open line of communication enables us to learn about our partner’s desires and preferences in terms of sexual intimacy.

Strengthen Emotional Intimacy

Sharing our emotions andbeing vulnerablecan sometimes be challenging, especially when it comes to sexual relations. But greater emotional intimacy leads to stronger trust,and when trust is established in a relationship, we are often willing to take greater risks.

For instance, we might be more open to indulging in playfulness or acting outsexual fantasies. A willingness to try new things can increase excitement and satisfaction, resulting in a closer bond and enhanced sexual pleasure.

Why Vulnerability in Relationships Is So Important

Be Appreciative

Another way to increase sexual intimacy is toexpress thanksfor our partner’s loving gestures. If they drove the kids to sports practice or cooked a special dinner, tell them that their actions are appreciated.

It’s easier tobe in the mood for sexual activitieswhen we feel appreciated. Plus, when we express gratitude to our partners, they are also more motivated to fill our sexual needs.That makes this sexual intimacy tip a benefit for both parties involved.

Physical Ways to Increase Sexual Intimacy

There are also several physical ways to spice up our relationship. Exciting activities that can lead to intimate sex run the gamut from kissing to oral sex. Here are some other physical things we can do.

Be Flirty

When we’re in a long-term relationship, we sometimes forget thevalue of being flirtywith our partner. But taking this approach is one way to promote their desire for sex, leading to greater sexual intimacy.

Research indicates that the type of flirting that is most effective can vary based on sex. While flirtatious acts that suggest greater sexual access tend to work better for men, those that suggest an emotional commitment and/or exclusivity are often more effective for women.

15 Tips For Better Flirting, According to Relationship Experts

Engage in Foreplay

Some couples may feel as if there’s not enough time forforeplay before sex, especially if they have kids or a busy home and work life. But foreplay can increase sexual enjoyment while also leading to easier orgasm.So, there are benefits to allowing time for arousal.

Foreplay is an important step in warming up to intimate sex. Simply kissing our partner tenderly or giving them a sensual massage can set the mood for what’s to come.

Lock Eyes

Prolonged eye contact from across the room or during foreplay is another way to physically engage with our partners, increasing their desire for intimate sex. Looking intently at the person we love can show our readiness to move forward intimately.

Express Physical Affection

Physical affectioncan be expressed through multiple gestures. We can cuddle on the couch, massage our partner’s shoulders, or hold their hands. Sensual forms of intimacy are important too, like sharing a delicious, decadent dessert or having our partner massage our body with oils.

Don’t Forget Orgasms

In one study about partner intimate touch and interpersonal closeness, scientists measured closeness after orgasmic meditation, a partnered non-verbal practice that includes genital touch. Researchers found that partner-intimate touching increased feelings of closeness.

This point may be more important for women as studies have found that they typically have more orgasms when in a committed relationship as opposed to when they participate in casual sex.

How to Be More Sexually Intimate With Your Partner

Getting Help for More Intimate Sex

A warm and intimate sex life supports greater health. For individuals who are having difficulties in their sexual relationships or can’t find closeness and connectedness with the people they are dating or living with, it can be helpful to seek help about this matter.

Both in-person andonline sex therapy practitionerscan help uncover issues, and then work to turn them around. Don’t be embarrassed about looking for such assistance. These well-trained specialists can offer guidance on how to find the loving and satisfying relationships we seek…and truly deserve.

What Is Sex Therapy?

13 Sources

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.

Rodrigue C, Fernet M.A metasynthesis of qualitative studies on casual sexual relationships and experiences.Canad J Human Sex. 2016;25(3):225-242. doi:10.3138/cjhs.253-A6

Cabeza de Baca T, Espel ES, Robles TF, et al.Sexual intimacy in couples is associated with longer telomere length.Psychoneuroendocrinol. 2017;81:46-51. doi:10.1016/j.psyneuen.2017.03.022

National Council on Aging.Why is intimacy important in older adults?

Beaulieu N, Bergeron S, Brassard A, Byers ES, Péloquin K.Toward an integrative model of intimacy, sexual satisfaction, and relationship satisfaction: A prospective study in long-term couples.J Sex Res. 2023;60(8):1100-1112. doi:10.1080/00224499.2022.2129557

Birnie-Porter C, Hunt M.Does relationship status matter for sexual satisfaction? The roles of intimacy and attachment avoidance in sexual satisfaction across five types of ongoing sexual relationships.Canad J Human Sex. 2015;24(2):174-183. doi:10.3138/cjhs.242-A5

van Lankveld J, Jacobs N, Thewissen V, Dewitte M, Verboon P.The associations of intimacy and sexuality in daily life: Temporal dynamics and gender effects within romantic relationships.J Soc Person Relation. 2018;35(4):557-576. doi:10.1177/0265407517743076

Schoebi D, Randall AK.Emotional dynamics in intimate relationships.Emotion Rev. 2015;7(4):342-348. doi:10.1177/1754073915590620

Brady A, Baker LR, Impett EA.Gratitude increases the motivation to fulfill a partner’s sexual needs.Soc Psycholog Personal Sci. 2020;12(2):273-281. doi:10.1177/1948550619898971

Wade TJ, Feldman A.Sex and the perceived effectiveness of flirtation techniques.Human Ethol Bull. 2016;31(2):30-44.

University of Arizona.Sex talk: Is foreplay important? How does someone make it safe but fun?

Prause N, Siegle GJ, Coan J.Partner intimate touch is associated with increased interpersonal closeness, especially in non-romantic partners.PLoS One. 2021;16(3):e0246065. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0246065

Wongsomboon V, Burleson MH, Webster GD.Women’s orgasm and sexual satisfaction in committed sex and casual sex: Relationship between sociosexuality and sexual outcomes in different sexual contexts.J Sex Res. 2020;57(3):285-295. doi:10.1080/00224499.2019.1672036

Meet Our Review Board

Share Feedback

Was this page helpful?Thanks for your feedback!What is your feedback?HelpfulReport an ErrorOtherSubmit

Was this page helpful?

Thanks for your feedback!

What is your feedback?HelpfulReport an ErrorOtherSubmit

What is your feedback?