Table of ContentsView AllTable of ContentsIt’s Not Uncommon to Dream About an ExWhat Does Dreaming About Your Ex Mean?What to Do If You Keep Dreaming About Your Ex
Table of ContentsView All
View All
Table of Contents
It’s Not Uncommon to Dream About an Ex
What Does Dreaming About Your Ex Mean?
What to Do If You Keep Dreaming About Your Ex
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Do you keep dreaming about your ex? Do you wonder why you’re having thesedreamsand what they mean? Do the dreams upset you or confuse you, as you try to figure out what they’re trying to tell you?
If you’re dreaming about an ex, don’t worry. You’re definitely not alone, and it doesn’t mean you’re still in love with them or unhappy in your current relationship. All it means for sure is that you dreamed about them; which, let’s be honest, we dream about a lot of weird things. It’s easy—and sometimes fun—to read into our dreams, but don’t let it affect your current relationship, and you don’t need to feel guilty.
What Do Sexual Dreams Mean?
It’s not uncommon to dream about people in your life, including ex partners, saysVijayeta Sinh, PhD, a licensed clinical psychologist who specializes in relationships.
For instance, Dr. Sinh says you might dream about people who are meaningful to you in some way, such as your partner, children, friends, or pets. “Sometimes this can also include people who are in the periphery of your life such as a neighbor, boss, colleague, or old friend.”
As for ex partners, Dr. Sinh says you may be more likely to dream about them if you still have an emotional connection with them after your relationship with them has ended.
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Your dreams about your ex partner may feature emotionally charged events such as arguments, conflicts, moments of fun, laughter, or physical intimacy, says Dr. Sinh. These dreams can feel extremely vivid and lifelike, because dreams can engage all your senses and feature sensations like touch, taste, sound, smell, sight, movement, and emotions.
Dreams about your ex may leave you disturbed if they make you wonder whether it’s a mistake to notbe with themanymore. Or, if you’re in a relationship with someone else, dreaming about your ex may make you feel guilty and ashamed, even if the thought ofcheatinghasn’t crossed your mind while you’re awake.
The exact reasons why we dream are still unknown, although there areseveral theories.However, research shows us that dreaming may help us process and consolidate our emotional memories, and develop greater insights.
“Dreams are an interesting way to examine the workings of our minds—they can sometimes be reflective of ourunconscioushopes, desires, fantasies and unfulfilled wishes. In order to determine the meaning of dreams, we need to pay closer attention to the themes they point to, not necessarily the content they depict,” says Dr. Sinh.
If you dream frequently about your ex, Dr. Sinh says you may want to think about any unresolved feelings you have about them or any fears, insecurities, and desires being activated in the dreams.
Or, a dream where you’re intimate with them could indicate a desire for morefriendshipand connection in your life, although not necessarily with your ex. They may have featured in your dream because that’s when you last experienced it, or because they were your first love and you associate them with intimacy.
It’s important to note that dreaming about an ex doesn’t necessarily mean that:
Why the “No Contact” Rule Is So Important After a Breakup
These are some steps you can take to explore the meanings of your dreams, according to Dr. Sinh:
How to Stop Dreaming About Work
Dreaming about your ex partner can bring up confusing feelings that you may not know what to do with. Even if you’re completelyover your exor in a relationship with someone else, you may find yourself wondering what these dreams mean.
It’s important to note that rather than being literal indicators of our subconscious needs and wishes, dreams are often metaphorical clues.“Introspection, self-awareness, journaling, and therapy can sometimes help us uncover deeper feelings that are hard to accept or easy to deny or minimize,” says Dr. Sinh.
What Does It Mean When You Dream About Someone?
6 Sources
Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.
Kahan TL, Claudatos S.Phenomenological features of dreams: Results from dream log studies using the Subjective Experiences Rating Scale (SERS).Conscious Cogn. 2016;41:159-176. doi:10.1016/j.concog.2016.02.007
National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke.Understanding sleep.
Mangiaruga A, Scarpelli S, Bartolacci C, De Gennaro L.Spotlight on dream recall: the ages of dreams.Nat Sci Sleep. 2018;10:1-12. doi:10.2147/NSS.S135762
Sutton A.Measuring the effects of self-awareness: construction of the self-awareness outcomes questionnaire.Eur J Psychol. 2016;12(4):645-658. doi:10.5964/ejop.v12i4.1178
Malinowski JE, Horton CL.Metaphor and hyperassociativity: the imagination mechanisms behind emotion assimilation in sleep and dreaming.Front Psychol. 2015;6:1132.
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