Shame is an emotion that many of us don’t talk about, even when it wreaks havoc on our lives. It refers to a deeply rooted core belief that something about us is intrinsically wrong. There’s a high likelihood that we don’t even realize what we’re feeling is ‘shame’ and instead we might use words like ‘guilt’ or ’embarrassment.’
What Exactly Is Cyberbullying?
While most bullying in schools still takes place in physical locations, the virtual space has become a new venue for abuse. Cyberbullying can take place on various platforms and can manifest in one of the following ways:
Signs That Cyberbullying Has Affected You
Not everyone who experiences cyberbullying will suffer from long-term consequences, butresearchshows that the trauma can pop up in unexpected ways. The most consistent finding is that victims of bullying are at a higher risk for internalization of problems.
This means that they are more likely to blame themselves for negative situations than seeing them as external. Working with a counsellor who specializes in narrative therapy could be helpful if this is the case. The stories that we tell ourselves are powerful and many of us need to learn how to separate our sense of self from feelings of anxiety or depression.
This tendency to internalize pain can also manifest in poor overall health. Victims of bullying report more bodily pain, headaches, and slower recovery from illnesses. It’s not that ailments are “all in your head” but rather that high levels of stress can change your brain’s functioning. Chronically high C-reactive protein (CRP) levels, for example,were foundin the blood of people who had been bullied children. This condition can cause inflammation, cardiovascular diseases, metabolic disorders, and depression.
Perhaps due to the dangerous mixture of academic distraction and low self-esteem, victims of bullying have less educational qualification, unstable employment, and more money problems. In fact, bullied childrenwere foundto work lower paying jobs than their peers at age 50. It’s understandable that difficulty functioning in a school environment would lead to discomfort or even emotional triggers at work. If you have a history of being bullied and notice that you’re having issues at work, atherapistcould help you adjust patterns.
Preventing Cyberbullying
People who have experienced cyberbullying should remind themselves how prevalent this issue has become. Today, 20% of students aged 12-18 have reported instances of bullying, 15% of which happened online.
The cycle of abuse continues to play out behind the screen, in our virtual communities. Most of us, and especially younger generations, communicate primarily online where it’s easier to quickly spread information without fully realizing the real and harmful ramifications it might have on another person. It’s also worth noting that many bullies are bullied themselves; educating them on cycles of abuse can help eradicate the behaviour.
Adults working with, or parenting, children should open direct lines of communication, free from judgement. We should check in and see how someone is doing if they seem in distress and interrupt thoughts that lead to shame. Given the knowledge we now have about the long-term implications of cyberbullying, addressing it at this stage could make a real difference in our children’s lives well beyond their teen years.
Our goal at Talkspace is to provide the most up-to-date, valuable, and objective information on mental health-related topics in order to help readers make informed decisions.
Articles contain trusted third-party sources that are either directly linked to in the text or listed at the bottom to take readers directly to the source.
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