Redefining Sobriety: The Rise of the California Sober Lifestyle

Table of ContentsTable of ContentsExpandWhat Is California Sober?Why Is a California Sober Lifestyle Controversial?Does Being California Sober Work?What Mental Health Experts SayBenefits of Being California SoberBottom LineView AllBack To Top

Table of ContentsExpandWhat Is California Sober?Why Is a California Sober Lifestyle Controversial?Does Being California Sober Work?What Mental Health Experts SayBenefits of Being California SoberBottom LineView All

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What Is California Sober?

Why Is a California Sober Lifestyle Controversial?

Does Being California Sober Work?

What Mental Health Experts Say

Benefits of Being California Sober

Bottom Line

View All

But that pathway to a healthier relationship with substances like alcohol or drugs is not the only one. California Sober is a methodology that is coming to be known more and more in recovery circles. For some, it’s a lifeline; for others, it’s seen as blasphemy.

Now, just a few years later, they have shifted gears, acknowledging publicly that the lifestyle led to relapse. Those who spoke to us for this story and mentioned celebrities like Lovato were quick to point out that just because your recovery is based on abstinence or something closer to a California sober way of living does not mean you will always be in one category or the other. Recovery, like life, is fluid.

“It’s hard for someone who’s trying to get sober to watch somebody else live out their fantasy.”

Those are the words ofBill Blaber CARC, CRPA, director of the recovery coaching program at Mountainside Treatment Center, who himself is in long-term recovery. He says that part of the reason the California sober lifestyle can be such a hot-button issue within recovery communities is that these journeys are not linear and not equal.“The reason I think it’s controversial is there’s so many people out there who do need to be abstinent, right? And there’s a little bit of envy, there’s a little bit of judgment when they know that someone out there could be [California] sober,” says Blaber.

It’s hard for someone who’s trying to get sober to watch somebody else live out their fantasy.—BILL BLABER, CARC, CRPA

It’s hard for someone who’s trying to get sober to watch somebody else live out their fantasy.

—BILL BLABER, CARC, CRPA

Jason VanRuler (LPC-MH), a South Dakota-based counselor in private practice at Solomon Recovery who is in recovery and does drink alcohol on occasion, boils down the friction to the fundamental meaning of the termsober.

But even those who are skeptical of the benefits of being California sober, like the co-founder of the digital recovery community, Loosid,MJ Gottlieb, say that it can still be a tool to help people understand their addiction as long as they are searching for the root cause of the issue.“There could be real alcoholics that are having extreme benefits of California sober, I’m not one of them… I was one of the people that wrecked towns and villages as a result of smoking a simple joint, which then made me romanticize a simple drink, which then had me romanticize a simple eight-ball, which then had me waking up inside of a jail cell.”

In other words, it’s personal, and it’s complicated.

What Sober Curiosity and Alcohol Alternatives Can Do For Mental Health

Blaber—who is adamant that California sober techniques fall well within the boundaries of harm reduction—says that a common misconception is that people following the framework are being cavalier about theirsubstance use. He says that what is actually needed in order for success, like he’s seen with clients over his career, is a foundation and a direction.“California sober isn’t ‘Oh, I’m gonna use what I feel like it.’… there needs to be a plan, a wellness plan behind it,” says Blaber.

That plan involves being open and honest with people in your circle about the path you’re taking, given thatrelapsingis a very real risk no matter whatstage of recoveryyou are in.

In VanRuler’s case, his consumption of alcohol is highly self-regulated. He will only drink on Friday and Saturday nights and does not consume more than two in any one evening. He says that it’s important for him to be continually in tune with his boundaries.

“If for some reason that would change and I’m no longer able to kind of follow these guidelines that I’ve set out for myself, I’d be done with alcohol.”

What to Expect From Drug and Alcohol Rehab Programs

How Do Mental Health Practitioners View the Idea of Being California Sober?

Dr. Evan Espinosa, PsyD, a clinical psychologist and member of the leadership team at Recovia, says that being California Sober can have its benefits but that it can sometimes be harder than other forms of staying away from harmful substances.“Because you really have to do a lot of deep diving on it yourself, your cravings, your triggers, your overall ability, and how you are maintaining progress towards your goals, as opposed to if you’re just sober-sober, the answer’s no to everything,” Espinosa explains.

Espinosa recommends his clients spend 30 days entirely sober from all substances so that they can identify these triggers, cravings, needs, and wants. From there, people can choose whether something like being California sober might be a good fit for them. He says methods likepsychoeducationandmotivational interviewingare ideal when it comes to supporting those in the early stages of recovery to ask things of themselves.“How do you find [ways of] coping in your social self, your emotional self, your spiritual self, in your behaviors? Let’s get you set up with a routine when your brain can get dopamine and serotonin from other more natural, healthy sources outside of just drugs,” Espinosa adds.

8 Natural Ways to Increase Your Dopamine Levels

Thinking of exploring a California sober lifestyle? Here are some potential benefits and downfalls to consider:

Pros:

Cons:

If you are contemplating exploring a California sober lifestyle it’s important to speak to those in your support network, including medical professionals, to make sure that you have the tools and resources available to you to succeed.

How to Stay Sober

Regardless of how you feel about the concept of being California sober, Gottlieb says it’s important to acknowledge that people in recovery are asking questions about it every day.

“[Last week] I was up in the mountains in Los Feliz having this very discussion with one person who was using marijuana and another person who was not, and I think it’s very good to always open up a very important dialogue about it, as opposed to excluding and shutting the topic down altogether.”

VanRuler says that discussions around various methods of recovery can miss the point if they’re too prescriptive.

“I think we have to be careful because sometimes the reason people struggle with addiction is they feel they’ve never been seen, heard or had a voice," VanRuler starts. “And so if we say, Oh, I’m so sorry, you’re struggling with that, now you just need to do all of these things. And we don’t really care how you feel about it. Sometimes, I wonder if we’re not just doing more of the same.”

As for Espinosa, he likens the reason he isn’t a one-method truther to a culinary metaphor.“That’d be like me saying that the only way to make a spaghetti sauce is how my grandmother taught me,” Espinosa says. “Well, no. there’s tons of grandmothers, grandfathers out there, and people out there who make a damn good spaghetti sauce.”

What This Means For YouThe prevailing message from those who spoke to usfor this story is that the goal is recovery; how you get there is individual, regardless of society’s expectations, but it does require taking action.

What This Means For You

The prevailing message from those who spoke to usfor this story is that the goal is recovery; how you get there is individual, regardless of society’s expectations, but it does require taking action.

Or, as Blaber puts it:“Please do not stay away from the treatment world or the recovery world because you don’t want to put everything down.”

2 SourcesVerywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.Swartz R.Medical marijuana users in substance abuse treatment.Harm Reduct J. 2010;7(1):3.Sliedrecht W, de Waart R, Witkiewitz K, Roozen HG.Alcohol use disorder relapse factors: A systematic review.Psychiatry Research. 2019;278:97-115.Additional ReadingSobell, Linda C., Timothy P. Ellingstad, and Mark B. Sobell. “Natural recovery from alcohol and drug problems: Methodological review of the research with suggestions for future directions.“Addiction95.5 (2000): 749-764.Witkiewitz K, Wilson AD, Roos CR, et al.Can individuals with alcohol use disorder sustain non-abstinent recovery? Non-abstinent outcomes 10 years after alcohol use disorder treatment.J Addict Med. 2021;15(4):303-310.

2 Sources

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.Swartz R.Medical marijuana users in substance abuse treatment.Harm Reduct J. 2010;7(1):3.Sliedrecht W, de Waart R, Witkiewitz K, Roozen HG.Alcohol use disorder relapse factors: A systematic review.Psychiatry Research. 2019;278:97-115.Additional ReadingSobell, Linda C., Timothy P. Ellingstad, and Mark B. Sobell. “Natural recovery from alcohol and drug problems: Methodological review of the research with suggestions for future directions.“Addiction95.5 (2000): 749-764.Witkiewitz K, Wilson AD, Roos CR, et al.Can individuals with alcohol use disorder sustain non-abstinent recovery? Non-abstinent outcomes 10 years after alcohol use disorder treatment.J Addict Med. 2021;15(4):303-310.

Swartz R.Medical marijuana users in substance abuse treatment.Harm Reduct J. 2010;7(1):3.Sliedrecht W, de Waart R, Witkiewitz K, Roozen HG.Alcohol use disorder relapse factors: A systematic review.Psychiatry Research. 2019;278:97-115.

Swartz R.Medical marijuana users in substance abuse treatment.Harm Reduct J. 2010;7(1):3.

Sliedrecht W, de Waart R, Witkiewitz K, Roozen HG.Alcohol use disorder relapse factors: A systematic review.Psychiatry Research. 2019;278:97-115.

Sobell, Linda C., Timothy P. Ellingstad, and Mark B. Sobell. “Natural recovery from alcohol and drug problems: Methodological review of the research with suggestions for future directions.“Addiction95.5 (2000): 749-764.Witkiewitz K, Wilson AD, Roos CR, et al.Can individuals with alcohol use disorder sustain non-abstinent recovery? Non-abstinent outcomes 10 years after alcohol use disorder treatment.J Addict Med. 2021;15(4):303-310.

Witkiewitz K, Wilson AD, Roos CR, et al.Can individuals with alcohol use disorder sustain non-abstinent recovery? Non-abstinent outcomes 10 years after alcohol use disorder treatment.J Addict Med. 2021;15(4):303-310.

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How Do Mental Health Practitioners View the Idea of Being California Sober?#

What This Means For You#

How Do Mental Health Practitioners View the Idea of Being California Sober?

What This Means For You