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Permissive parents tend to be very loving, yet provide few guidelines and rules. These parents do not expect mature behavior from their children andoften seem more like a friendthan parental figure.
These parents tend to be the polar opposite of the so-called “helicopter parents.” Instead of hovering over their children’s every move, permissive parents are incredibly lax and rarely make or enforce any type of rules or structure. Their motto is often simply that “kids will be kids.” While they are usually warm and loving, they make little or no attempt to control or discipline their kids.
Early Research on Permissive Parenting
Permissive parenting is sometimes known as indulgent parenting. Parents who exhibit this style make relatively few demands on their children. Because these parents have low expectations for self-control and maturity, discipline is a rarity.
According to Baumrind, permissive parents “are more responsive than they are demanding. They are nontraditional and lenient, do not require mature behavior, allow considerable self-regulation, and avoid confrontation.”
Characteristics of Permissive Parenting
Permissive parents:
What’s Your Parenting Style?
This fast and freeparenting styles quizcan help you analyze the methods you’re using to parent your kids and whether or not it may be a good idea to learn some new parenting behaviors:
The Effects of Permissive Parenting
Since these parents have few requirements for mature behavior, children may lack skills in social settings. While they may be good at interpersonal communication, they lack other important skills such as sharing.
Positive Effects of Permissive Parenting
While research has shown that permissive parenting has numerous downsides, there are some positive aspects.
One study found that while authoritative parenting resulted in better outcomes for several measures, permissive parenting produced optimum outcomes in terms of self-esteem and social well-being.
Some researchers suggest that cultural factors play an important role in the effects of parenting styles. Much of the research concluding that authoritative parenting is the best approach was conducted in Western cultures, while other studies indicate that other styles, such as permissive parenting, might be just as effective in other cultures.
RecapWhile studies suggest that permissive parenting has a number of downsides, other research has shown that this style may have some benefits. Cultural factors may also influence the impact of each type of parenting style.
Recap
While studies suggest that permissive parenting has a number of downsides, other research has shown that this style may have some benefits. Cultural factors may also influence the impact of each type of parenting style.
How to Change Permissive Parenting
If you tend to be a pushover or struggle to enforce rules, consider looking for ways that you can develop some moreauthoritative parentinghabits. This can be difficult at times, because it often means becoming stricter, enforcing rules, and being able to cope with your child being upset.
Some strategies you might consider:
Get Advice From The Verywell Mind PodcastThis episode ofThe Verywell Mind Podcastshares what mentally strong parents do.
Get Advice From The Verywell Mind Podcast
This episode ofThe Verywell Mind Podcastshares what mentally strong parents do.
A Word From Verywell
Permissive parenting can lead to a number of problems, so it pays to consciously try to utilize a more authoritative approach if you recognize these signs of permissiveness in your own parenting.
If you tend to be more of a permissive parent, think of ways that you can help your children understand your expectations and guidelines and be consistent about your enforcement of these rules. By providing your kids with the right balance of structure and support, you can ensure that they grow up with the skills they need to succeed in life.
Co-Parenting: What It Is and How to Make It Work
10 Sources
Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.
Power TG.Parenting dimensions and styles: a brief history and recommendations for future research.Childhood Obesity. 2013;9(s1):S-14-S-21. doi:10.1089/chi.2013.0034
Dalimonte-Merckling D, Williams JM.Parenting styles and their effects. In:Encyclopedia of Infant and Early Childhood Development. Elsevier; 2020:470-480. doi:10.1016/B978-0-12-809324-5.23611-0
Masud S, Mufarrih SH, Qureshi NQ, Khan F, Khan S, Khan MN.Academic performance in adolescent students: the role of parenting styles and socio-demographic factors – a cross sectional study from peshawar, pakistan.Front Psychol. 2019;10:2497. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2019.02497
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Howe AS, Heath A-LM, Lawrence J, et al.Parenting style and family type, but not child temperament, are associated with television viewing time in children at two years of age. Reed P, ed.PLoS ONE. 2017;12(12):e0188558. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0188558
Calafat A, García F, Juan M, Becoña E, Fernández-Hermida JR.Which parenting style is more protective against adolescent substance use? Evidence within the European context.Drug Alcohol Depend. 2014;138:185-92. doi:10.1016/j.drugalcdep.2014.02.705
Garcia F, Serra E, Garcia OF, Martinez I, Cruise E.A third emerging stage for the current digital society? Optimal parenting styles in Spain, the United States, Germany, and Brazil.Int J Environ Res Public Health. 2019;16(13):2333. doi:10.3390/ijerph16132333
García F, Gracia E.Is always authoritative the optimum parenting style? Evidence from Spanish families.Adolescence. 2009;44(173):101-31. PMID: 19435170.
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