After death from drugs, it is normal for the person’s relatives and loved ones to grieve. However, supporting people who are going through drug-related bereavement can be complicated.While there may be beautiful memories of positive experiences with the loved one who has died, there may also be negative experiences. For instance, they may have experienced distressseeing the loved one intoxicatedor violent, have legal or financial problems that affect the family, as well as a possible history ofphysical, emotional, or sexual abuse, or other difficulties.The loss of a friend or family member from drugs can be particularly painful if the person was young and otherwise healthy. Despite the negative emotions death can bring up, you can still find a way to be supportive of someone who has lost a loved one to drug addiction. You may find inspiration from the list of suggestions below.
After death from drugs, it is normal for the person’s relatives and loved ones to grieve. However, supporting people who are going through drug-related bereavement can be complicated.
While there may be beautiful memories of positive experiences with the loved one who has died, there may also be negative experiences. For instance, they may have experienced distressseeing the loved one intoxicatedor violent, have legal or financial problems that affect the family, as well as a possible history ofphysical, emotional, or sexual abuse, or other difficulties.
The loss of a friend or family member from drugs can be particularly painful if the person was young and otherwise healthy. Despite the negative emotions death can bring up, you can still find a way to be supportive of someone who has lost a loved one to drug addiction. You may find inspiration from the list of suggestions below.
Be Present
PeopleImages/DigitalVision/Getty Images
Ways to do this include:
The Impact of Social Isolation on Mental Health
ListenWorry less about saying the “right” thing and more about allowing the person to speak about their experience, if they choose. Be patient and give them the option to talk about whatever is on their mind as listening with respect can open the door to better communication with the person who is bereaved.Listening involvesgiving the person your full attentionwhile allowing them the space to speak without interruption.
Listen
Worry less about saying the “right” thing and more about allowing the person to speak about their experience, if they choose. Be patient and give them the option to talk about whatever is on their mind as listening with respect can open the door to better communication with the person who is bereaved.
Listening involvesgiving the person your full attentionwhile allowing them the space to speak without interruption.
Accept Their Feelings
None of these feelings are wrong, and your acceptance of them will help your friend to process them.
Express Sympathy
It’s okay toexpress genuine empathyaround universal human emotions that may be a part of grief,such as anger, sadness, disappointment, and regret.
What to Say to Someone Who Lost a Loved One
Stay Neutral
Staying calm and neutral is most supportive to someone who has lost a loved one to drugs.Huy Lam / Getty Images
Staying neutral can be tricky, especially if you had negative experiences with or opinions about the deceased. But it is more supportive toexpress no judgmentthan to express negative feelings about the person who has died, even if the bereaved does so.
Encourage and Support Self Care
Hoxton/Justin Pumfrey/Getty Images
Help With Practicalities
There may be additional practicalities to take care of, that can seem overwhelming to the bereaved, such as:
Helping with these isanother way to offer support.
Know When to Take a BreakStuart Ashley / Getty ImagesIt can be hard offering support to someone who has lost an addicted loved one. Emotions can run high, and it can be quite draining trying to help. Ifyou feel overwhelmed, back off and take a break.Don’t allow resentment to mount, then vent to someone else about the bereaved person. If they find out, this may be more hurtful to the bereaved than if you hadn’t tried to support them in the first place.
Know When to Take a Break
Stuart Ashley / Getty Images
It can be hard offering support to someone who has lost an addicted loved one. Emotions can run high, and it can be quite draining trying to help. Ifyou feel overwhelmed, back off and take a break.
Don’t allow resentment to mount, then vent to someone else about the bereaved person. If they find out, this may be more hurtful to the bereaved than if you hadn’t tried to support them in the first place.
Accompany the PersonThere may be events following the death of someone with an addiction that will be very difficult for the bereaved person. To be supportive, you can offer to accompany them to:Make statements to the police or to reportersTalk to doctors, funeral directors, and lawyersAttend a court proceedingAt the same time, it’s important to respect the bereaved person’s wishes if they want to do these things alone.
Accompany the Person
There may be events following the death of someone with an addiction that will be very difficult for the bereaved person. To be supportive, you can offer to accompany them to:
At the same time, it’s important to respect the bereaved person’s wishes if they want to do these things alone.
Recognize Grief is a ProcessPatryce Bak / Getty ImagesGrief is a complex process involvingseveral stagesand a range of different, often contradictory emotions. People vary greatly in how long it takes them to recover after losing someone to drugs.Allow the bereaved to go through this process in their own way and in their own time while having faith that eventually, they will find peace.How to Support Someone Who Lost a Loved One to Drugs
Recognize Grief is a Process
Patryce Bak / Getty Images
Grief is a complex process involvingseveral stagesand a range of different, often contradictory emotions. People vary greatly in how long it takes them to recover after losing someone to drugs.Allow the bereaved to go through this process in their own way and in their own time while having faith that eventually, they will find peace.
How to Support Someone Who Lost a Loved One to Drugs
5 Sources
Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.
Reime MA, Løseth HM, Lindeman SK, Titlestad KB, Dyregrov K, Selseng LB.Professional helpers' experiences of assisting the bereaved after drug-related deaths: A knowledge gap.Nordic Stud Alcoh Drugs. 2022;39(4):453-65. doi:10.1177/14550725221085345
Fernández-Alcántara M, Cruz-Quintana F, Pérez-Marfil MN, Catena-Martínez A, Pérez-García M, Turnbull OH.Assessment of emotional experience and emotional recognition in complicated grief.Front Psychol. 2016;7:126. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2016.00126
Milic J, Muka T, Ikram MA, Franco OH, Tiemeier H.Determinants and predictors of grief severity and persistence: The Rotterdam Study.J Aging Health. 2017;29(8):1288-1307. doi:10.1177/0898264317720715
Fjaer S, Dyregrov K.Advice to policy-makers for improving services to the drug-death bereaved.Nord Stud Alcoh Drugs. 2021;38(6):615-30. doi:10.1177/14550725211018333
Kübler-Ross E.On Death and Dying.Orford J, Natera G, Copello A, et al.Coping with Alcohol and Drug Problems: The Experiences of Family Members in Three Contrasting Cultures.
Kübler-Ross E.On Death and Dying.
Orford J, Natera G, Copello A, et al.Coping with Alcohol and Drug Problems: The Experiences of Family Members in Three Contrasting Cultures.
Meet Our Review Board
Share Feedback
Was this page helpful?Thanks for your feedback!What is your feedback?HelpfulReport an ErrorOtherSubmit
Was this page helpful?
Thanks for your feedback!
What is your feedback?HelpfulReport an ErrorOtherSubmit
What is your feedback?
