How to Show More Compassion to Others—and Why You Should

Table of ContentsView AllTable of ContentsThe Value of CompassionSigns That You’re Feeling CompassionThe Two Main Types of CompassionHow to Flex Those Compassion MusclesWhy Compassion Can Make a Real DifferenceSimple Ways You Can Be More CompassionatePractice MindfulnessPotential Pitfalls of Compassion

Table of ContentsView All

View All

Table of Contents

The Value of Compassion

Signs That You’re Feeling Compassion

The Two Main Types of Compassion

How to Flex Those Compassion Muscles

Why Compassion Can Make a Real Difference

Simple Ways You Can Be More Compassionate

Practice Mindfulness

Potential Pitfalls of Compassion

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Compassion involves feeling another person’s pain and wanting to take steps to help relieve their suffering. The word compassion itself derives from Latin and means “to suffer together.”

Think of compassion as a revved-up, more active form of empathy. It’s why you might send your friend a “just checking in” text when you know they’ve had a rough day. When you notice your co-worker is extra quiet, compassion is why you offer a quick, “Hey, you seem a little off today. Is everything OK?”

Compassion allows you to acknowledge someone’s struggles and respond with kindness, care, and support. It’s empathy in action. Showing compassion to yourself and others can strengthen relationships, increase happiness, and lower stress.

The 6 Types of Basic Emotions and Their Effect on Human Behavior

How can you tell when what you are feeling is compassion (or empathy or sympathy or something else)? Some signs that what you are experiencing is compassion include:

The key factor that distinguishes compassion from similar emotions is the desire to help. If you recognize their pain, that’s empathy. If understanding their pain causes you to take steps to relieve it, that’s compassion.

Experts often distinguish between the two main forms of compassion, which vary depending on where these feelings are directed.

Your experience of compassion may be either directed toward other people, or it may be directed inwardly toward yourself.

Compassion for Others

It really does hurt to know that others are hurting, and sometimes, that hurt makes us want to help. When you experience compassion for other people, you not only feel their pain—you also want to find a way to relieve their suffering. These feelings compel you to take action to do what you can to make the situation better.

Self-Compassion

Self-compassionis all about giving yourself grace instead criticism. It involves being able to acknowledge your weaknesses or failures without being judgmental or critical.

Instead of berating yourself, self-compassion allows you to treat yourself with the same kindness you’d show to a friend who is struggling.

Rather than beating yourself up over past mistakes, you feel understanding, mindful, andacceptingof yourself and your imperfections.

Even when you feel compassion, knowing how to best help or show your support is not always easy. You might feel awkward or uncomfortable or worry about making the situation worse. When emotions feel heavy and you aren’t quite sure how to help, there are several different steps you can take to show compassion to others.

Compassion and empathy share common elements, but compassion goes a step beyond. Rather than just imagining yourself in their shoes, compassion drives you to take action to help that person. Because you are able to feel those emotions so keenly—almost as if it is happening to you—there is a strong motivation to find a way to change the situation or ease the other person’s pain.

Compassion can have a positive impact on your life, ranging from improving your relationships to boosting your overall happiness. Some of the positive effects of compassion:

Giving Feels Good

One of the reasons why compassion can be so effective is that both giving and receiving can improve your psychological well-being. Being the recipient of compassion can help you get the support you need to carry you through a difficult time. But giving compassion to others can be just as rewarding.

For example, researchers have found that giving money to others who need it actually produces greater happiness rewards than spending it on ourselves.

It Helps People Live Longer

Helping others doesn’t just feel good—it can also help you live longer. Engaging in activities such as volunteering to help those you feel compassion for can improve your longevity. Research has found that people who volunteer out of concern for others tend to live longer, healthier lives than those who do not.

Showing Compassion Leads to a Life of Purpose

Compassion Improves Relationships

Compassion can also help you build thesocial supportand connections that are important for mental well-being. It can also protect yourinterpersonal relationships. Research suggests that compassion is a key predictor of the success and satisfaction of relationships.

According to one study published in the journalEmotion, compassion is the single 👏 most 👏important 👏 predictor of a happy relationship.

Interestingly, the study found that while people tend to gain the greatest benefits when their partner notices their acts of kindness, they actually experience benefits whether their partner notices or not. What does that mean, exactly? It suggests that compassion is its own reward.

RecapCompassion is good for both your physical and mental health. Not only that, it feels good to help others and can contribute to a greater sense of purpose and meaning in your life.

Recap

Compassion is good for both your physical and mental health. Not only that, it feels good to help others and can contribute to a greater sense of purpose and meaning in your life.

What Does Happiness Really Mean?

Bring Your Attention to the Situation

The first component of compassion is to become more aware of what other people are experiencing. Imagine yourself in their shoes. Being able to see things from another person’s perspective can help you gain a sense of compassion for their situation. Practice putting yourself in someone else’s place and imagine how you might feel. Focus on feeling how they might be feeling.

Let Go of Judgment

Accepting people as they are and avoiding judgment is important. Focus on accepting people for who they are without criticizing orblaming the victim.

Mindfulnessis a practice of focusing on the present, becoming more aware of your own thoughts, and observing these thoughts without judging them. Research suggests that mindfulness-based interventions can be effective for improving self-compassion.

Show a Little Love and Kindness (Through Meditation)

Loving-kindness meditationis a form of meditation, also known as compassion meditation, that involves meditating while directing kind, compassionate thoughts toward yourself or others. Research suggests that this form of meditation can help people improve their connection to others and boost well-being.

One potential pitfall of compassion is that constant exposure to the distress of others may contribute to what is known as compassion fatigue.

What Is Compassion Fatigue?Compassion fatigueinvolves feelings of physical and emotional exhaustion as well as a mental withdrawal from traumatized individuals. It can reduce feelings of empathy and compassion for people who are in need of help.

What Is Compassion Fatigue?

Compassion fatigueinvolves feelings of physical and emotional exhaustion as well as a mental withdrawal from traumatized individuals. It can reduce feelings of empathy and compassion for people who are in need of help.

People who work in helping or caregiving roles (such as nurses, doctors, or emergency care workers) often experience an extreme state of tension as well as a preoccupation with those they are helping. Because of this, helpers can experience symptoms oftraumathemselves. The result? It can potentially dampen their feelings of compassion.

Combating compassion fatigue is particularly important in healthcare and other helping professions. Research suggests that interventions that involvemindfulness meditationand other mindfulness-based practices can help people in these roles experience greater compassion for others, improve positive feelings, and reduce distress.

While it’s good to have compassion for others, it’s also crucial that you take the time you need for self-care.

Can You Have Too Much Empathy?

Takeaways

Learning this ability takes some time and practice, but it’s worth it to keep working on flexing your compassion skills. Being open to feeling what others are feeling can help you create deeper, more meaningful connections. Acting on these feelings of compassion can benefit others, but as the research suggests, sometimes compassion is its own reward.

11 Sources

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.

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Zeng X, Chiu CP, Wang R, Oei TP, Leung FY.The effect of loving-kindness meditation on positive emotions: a meta-analytic review.Front Psychol. 2015;6:1693. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2015.01693

Cocker F, Joss N.Compassion fatigue among healthcare, emergency and community service workers: a systematic review.Int J Environ Res Public Health. 2016;13(6):618. Published 2016 Jun 22. doi:10.3390/ijerph13060618

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