Grief vs. Depression: Which Is It?

Table of ContentsView AllTable of ContentsDefinitionsChallengesDifferencesTreatmentsGetting Help

Table of ContentsView All

View All

Table of Contents

Definitions

Challenges

Differences

Treatments

Getting Help

Grief and depression are similaremotional responses. That said, each is also a distinct experience. Understanding the differences in grief vs. depression is important for knowing how to best treat their symptoms.

Here we discuss what grief and depression are, as well as why it can be so hard to tell them apart. We then dive into the ways that depression and grief are different before exploring some of the treatment options for each—and botharetreatable.

At a GlanceGrief and depression involve intense feelings of sadness. However, grief tends to lessen over time while depression does not. There are also diagnostic and presentation differences. Help is possible for each, with treatment options often including medication, therapy, or both.

At a Glance

Grief and depression involve intense feelings of sadness. However, grief tends to lessen over time while depression does not. There are also diagnostic and presentation differences. Help is possible for each, with treatment options often including medication, therapy, or both.

Defining Grief and Depression

TheAmerican Psychological Association(APA) defines grief as “the anguish experienced after significant loss, usually the death of a beloved person.“Grief can also occur after losing a pet, a relationship, your job, your health, or anything else important to you.

If you are having suicidal thoughts, contact theNational Suicide Prevention Lifelineat988for support and assistance from a trained counselor. If you or a loved one are in immediate danger, call 911.For more mental health resources, see ourNational Helpline Database.

If you are having suicidal thoughts, contact theNational Suicide Prevention Lifelineat988for support and assistance from a trained counselor. If you or a loved one are in immediate danger, call 911.

For more mental health resources, see ourNational Helpline Database.

Depression also sometimes leads to cognitive issues. Someone diagnosed with depression may notice that they have trouble concentrating, for instance, or they might feel worthless, guilty, think about death, or havesuicidal thoughts or behaviors.

Why It’s Hard to Tell Depression From Grief

There are quite a few similarities between grief and depression. This can make it difficult to distinguish between the two.

One similarity is their cause. Grief is a result of loss and trauma.Someone we love ora pet passes awayand we grieve because they are no longer with us. Or we lose our job or are diagnosed with a major physical illness and experience grief when thinking of how we’ve lost life as we know it.

There are symptom similarities as well. Someone who is grieving can experience several of the same physical and psychological responses as someone with depression, some of which include:

Differences in Grief vs. Depression

Amidst their many similarities, there are also some clear differences in depression vs. grief. These differences exist in terms of how each is diagnosed, in addition to how they present (the way in which their symptoms appear).

Diagnostic Differences

TheDiagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders(DSM) outlines the criteria needed for a mental illness diagnosis. In the DSM-5, the latest edition of this manual, the “bereavement exclusion” was removed from the diagnosis of major depressive disorder (MDD).

Previously, this exclusion stated that during the first two months after the death of a loved one, a person with depression symptoms generally should not be diagnosed with MDD. However, the DSM-5 recognizes that while grief and MDD are distinct, they can also coexist. What’s more, just as with other stressful experiences, grief can sometimes trigger a major depressive episode.

Research indicates that as many as 42% of bereaved individuals develop clinical depression in the first month of their loss, with 16% continuing to have depression one year later.

The DSM-5 text revision (DSM-5-TR) also added a new diagnosis for people experiencing extreme grief after one year of the death of a loved one. This newly added condition is referred to asprolonged grief disorder(PGD) and is considered a trauma and stress-related disorder.

What to Know About the Depression Stage of Grief

Presentation Differences

In other words, a grieving person may feel better in certain situations, such as when friends and family are around to support them. But triggers like the birthday of a deceased loved one or going to a wedding after having finalized a divorce could cause the grief to resurface.

Depression, on the other hand, tends to be present no matter the circumstances. (An exception to this isatypical depression, in which positive events can bring about an improvement in mood.A person with atypical depression also tends to exhibit symptoms that are the opposite of those commonly experienced with grief, such as sleeping excessively, eating more, and gaining weight.)

Additionally, grief usually causes a person to feel a longing for or an urge to see their lost loved one again while depression tends to result in the opposite. Someone with depression doesn’t necessarily feel the urge to do anything or see anyone.

GriefLessens over timeDifficulty accepting whatever caused the griefExcessive focus on the episode of grief or avoidance of it altogetherThoughts of “joining” the deceasedDepressionIs persistent, regardless of the circumstancesFeelings of guilt not related to griefPreoccupation with self-worthlessnessThoughts of suicide

GriefLessens over timeDifficulty accepting whatever caused the griefExcessive focus on the episode of grief or avoidance of it altogetherThoughts of “joining” the deceased

Lessens over time

Difficulty accepting whatever caused the grief

Excessive focus on the episode of grief or avoidance of it altogether

Thoughts of “joining” the deceased

DepressionIs persistent, regardless of the circumstancesFeelings of guilt not related to griefPreoccupation with self-worthlessnessThoughts of suicide

Is persistent, regardless of the circumstances

Feelings of guilt not related to grief

Preoccupation with self-worthlessness

Thoughts of suicide

Treatment for Depression and Grief

Depression and griefaretreatable. While the specific treatments recommended can vary based on a person’s unique circumstances and symptom severity, they often consist of therapy, medication, or both.

Therapy

Interpersonal psychotherapy(IPT) is a form of therapy often used for depression but has the potential for helping to treat complicated grief as well. IPT focuses on resolving symptoms, building relationships, and getting involved in mood-boosting activities.

For people with prolonged grief disorder, grief-specific cognitive behavioral therapy may be helpful.This approach uses similar techniques ascognitive behavioral therapy(CBT), like reframing negative thoughts and learning healthy coping mechanisms. It can also help us learn how to maintain a healthy attachment to loved ones we have lost.

Complicated grief therapy (CGT) is another option found to be effective after a loss, especially for individuals not taking an antidepressant.This form ofgrief counselingis made up of components of both CBT and IPT. In CGT sessions, you may repeat the story of how you lost your loved one and set personal goals for yourself and your relationships.

Medication

Antidepressants are a class ofmedications used to treat depression. A physician or psychiatrist might also prescribe an antidepressant for individuals experiencing extreme and disruptive symptoms of grief.

Common antidepressants include:

Research suggests that a combination of medication and therapy is best for reducing grief.Evidence suggests the same for treating depression.

Social support can be another powerful tool when coping with symptoms of depression or symptoms of grief. Many mental health professionals recommend attending a support group with people who are facing or have faced similar challenges.

Whether you find asupport group for depressionor asupport group for grief, you may benefit from sharing your experiences with others, receiving their encouragement, and listening to their stories.

Getting Help for Grief or Depression

Whether you are experiencing grief vs. depression or depression vs. grief, a physician ormental health professionalcan help decide the best approach for treating your particular symptoms. Talk with them openly about how you feel, the severity of your symptoms, and how much they impact your life.

It’s important to remember that grief is not a sign of weakness. Likewise, reaching out for help when you experience depression symptoms is a sign of strength and can help get you on the road tobetter mental health.

19 SourcesVerywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.American Psychological Association.Grief.American Psychological Association.Depression.Klyce DW, Bombardier CH, Davis TJ, et al.Distinguishing grief from depression during acute recovery from spinal cord injury.Arch Phys Med Rehab. 2015;96(8):1419-1425. doi:10.1016/j.apmr.2015.02.018Harvard Health Publishing.What causes depression?American Psychiatric Association.Major depressive disorder and the “bereavement exclusion”.Francis LE, Kypriotakis G, O’Toole EE, Bowman KF, Rose JH.Grief and risk of depression in context: the emotional outcomes of bereaved cancer caregivers.Omega. 2015;70(4):351-379. doi:10.1177/0030222815573720Assareh AA, Sharpley CF, Mcfarlane JR, Sachdev PS.Biological determinants of depression following bereavement.Neurosci Biobehav Rev. 2015;49:171-81. doi:10.1016/j.neubiorev.2014.12.013Boelen PA, Lenferink LI.Prolonged grief disorder in DSM-5-TR: Early predictors and longitudinal measurement invariance.Aust N Z J Psychiatry. 2021;48674211025728. doi:10.1177/00048674211025728American Psychological Association.Speaking of psychology: How grieving changes the brain, with Mary-Frances O’Connor, PhD.Łojko D, Rybakowski JK.Atypical depression: current perspectives.Neuropsychiat Dis Treat. 2017;13:2447-2456. doi:10.2147/NDT.S147317American Psychological Association.New paths for people with prolonged grief disorder.Ribeiro Â, Ribeiro JP, Von Doellinger O.Depression and psychodynamic psychotherapy.Braz J Psychiatry. 2018;40(1):105-109. doi:10.1590/1516-4446-2016-2107Grief therapy more effective for bereaved adults than psychotherapy.JAMA.2014;312(20):2083. doi:10.1001/jama.2014.15872Szuhany KL, Malgaroli M, MironD C, Simon NM.Prolonged grief disorder: Course, diagnosis, assessment, and treatment.Focus. 2021;19(2):161-172. doi:10.1176/appi.focus.20200052Glickman K, Shear MK, Wall M.Exploring outcomes related to anxiety and depression in completers of a randomized controlled trial of complicated grief treatment.Clin Psychol Psychother. 2014;23(2):118-124. coi:10.1002/cpp.1940Harmer CJ, Duman RS, Cowen PJ.How do antidepressants work? New perspectives for refining future treatment approaches.Lancet Psychiatry. 2017;4(5):409-418. doi:10.1016/S2215-0366(17)30015-9Shear MK, Reynolds III CF, Simon NM, et al.Optimizing treatment of complicated grief: A randomized clinical trial.JAMA Psychiatry. 2016;73(7):685-694. doi:10.1001/jamapsychiatry.2016.0892American Psychological Association.How do I choose between medication and therapy?Lyons N, Cooper C.A systematic review and meta-analysis of group peer support interventions for people experiencing mental health conditions.BMC Psychiatry.2021;21(315). doi:10.1186/s12888-021-03321-z

19 Sources

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.American Psychological Association.Grief.American Psychological Association.Depression.Klyce DW, Bombardier CH, Davis TJ, et al.Distinguishing grief from depression during acute recovery from spinal cord injury.Arch Phys Med Rehab. 2015;96(8):1419-1425. doi:10.1016/j.apmr.2015.02.018Harvard Health Publishing.What causes depression?American Psychiatric Association.Major depressive disorder and the “bereavement exclusion”.Francis LE, Kypriotakis G, O’Toole EE, Bowman KF, Rose JH.Grief and risk of depression in context: the emotional outcomes of bereaved cancer caregivers.Omega. 2015;70(4):351-379. doi:10.1177/0030222815573720Assareh AA, Sharpley CF, Mcfarlane JR, Sachdev PS.Biological determinants of depression following bereavement.Neurosci Biobehav Rev. 2015;49:171-81. doi:10.1016/j.neubiorev.2014.12.013Boelen PA, Lenferink LI.Prolonged grief disorder in DSM-5-TR: Early predictors and longitudinal measurement invariance.Aust N Z J Psychiatry. 2021;48674211025728. doi:10.1177/00048674211025728American Psychological Association.Speaking of psychology: How grieving changes the brain, with Mary-Frances O’Connor, PhD.Łojko D, Rybakowski JK.Atypical depression: current perspectives.Neuropsychiat Dis Treat. 2017;13:2447-2456. doi:10.2147/NDT.S147317American Psychological Association.New paths for people with prolonged grief disorder.Ribeiro Â, Ribeiro JP, Von Doellinger O.Depression and psychodynamic psychotherapy.Braz J Psychiatry. 2018;40(1):105-109. doi:10.1590/1516-4446-2016-2107Grief therapy more effective for bereaved adults than psychotherapy.JAMA.2014;312(20):2083. doi:10.1001/jama.2014.15872Szuhany KL, Malgaroli M, MironD C, Simon NM.Prolonged grief disorder: Course, diagnosis, assessment, and treatment.Focus. 2021;19(2):161-172. doi:10.1176/appi.focus.20200052Glickman K, Shear MK, Wall M.Exploring outcomes related to anxiety and depression in completers of a randomized controlled trial of complicated grief treatment.Clin Psychol Psychother. 2014;23(2):118-124. coi:10.1002/cpp.1940Harmer CJ, Duman RS, Cowen PJ.How do antidepressants work? New perspectives for refining future treatment approaches.Lancet Psychiatry. 2017;4(5):409-418. doi:10.1016/S2215-0366(17)30015-9Shear MK, Reynolds III CF, Simon NM, et al.Optimizing treatment of complicated grief: A randomized clinical trial.JAMA Psychiatry. 2016;73(7):685-694. doi:10.1001/jamapsychiatry.2016.0892American Psychological Association.How do I choose between medication and therapy?Lyons N, Cooper C.A systematic review and meta-analysis of group peer support interventions for people experiencing mental health conditions.BMC Psychiatry.2021;21(315). doi:10.1186/s12888-021-03321-z

American Psychological Association.Grief.American Psychological Association.Depression.Klyce DW, Bombardier CH, Davis TJ, et al.Distinguishing grief from depression during acute recovery from spinal cord injury.Arch Phys Med Rehab. 2015;96(8):1419-1425. doi:10.1016/j.apmr.2015.02.018Harvard Health Publishing.What causes depression?American Psychiatric Association.Major depressive disorder and the “bereavement exclusion”.Francis LE, Kypriotakis G, O’Toole EE, Bowman KF, Rose JH.Grief and risk of depression in context: the emotional outcomes of bereaved cancer caregivers.Omega. 2015;70(4):351-379. doi:10.1177/0030222815573720Assareh AA, Sharpley CF, Mcfarlane JR, Sachdev PS.Biological determinants of depression following bereavement.Neurosci Biobehav Rev. 2015;49:171-81. doi:10.1016/j.neubiorev.2014.12.013Boelen PA, Lenferink LI.Prolonged grief disorder in DSM-5-TR: Early predictors and longitudinal measurement invariance.Aust N Z J Psychiatry. 2021;48674211025728. doi:10.1177/00048674211025728American Psychological Association.Speaking of psychology: How grieving changes the brain, with Mary-Frances O’Connor, PhD.Łojko D, Rybakowski JK.Atypical depression: current perspectives.Neuropsychiat Dis Treat. 2017;13:2447-2456. doi:10.2147/NDT.S147317American Psychological Association.New paths for people with prolonged grief disorder.Ribeiro Â, Ribeiro JP, Von Doellinger O.Depression and psychodynamic psychotherapy.Braz J Psychiatry. 2018;40(1):105-109. doi:10.1590/1516-4446-2016-2107Grief therapy more effective for bereaved adults than psychotherapy.JAMA.2014;312(20):2083. doi:10.1001/jama.2014.15872Szuhany KL, Malgaroli M, MironD C, Simon NM.Prolonged grief disorder: Course, diagnosis, assessment, and treatment.Focus. 2021;19(2):161-172. doi:10.1176/appi.focus.20200052Glickman K, Shear MK, Wall M.Exploring outcomes related to anxiety and depression in completers of a randomized controlled trial of complicated grief treatment.Clin Psychol Psychother. 2014;23(2):118-124. coi:10.1002/cpp.1940Harmer CJ, Duman RS, Cowen PJ.How do antidepressants work? New perspectives for refining future treatment approaches.Lancet Psychiatry. 2017;4(5):409-418. doi:10.1016/S2215-0366(17)30015-9Shear MK, Reynolds III CF, Simon NM, et al.Optimizing treatment of complicated grief: A randomized clinical trial.JAMA Psychiatry. 2016;73(7):685-694. doi:10.1001/jamapsychiatry.2016.0892American Psychological Association.How do I choose between medication and therapy?Lyons N, Cooper C.A systematic review and meta-analysis of group peer support interventions for people experiencing mental health conditions.BMC Psychiatry.2021;21(315). doi:10.1186/s12888-021-03321-z

American Psychological Association.Grief.

American Psychological Association.Depression.

Klyce DW, Bombardier CH, Davis TJ, et al.Distinguishing grief from depression during acute recovery from spinal cord injury.Arch Phys Med Rehab. 2015;96(8):1419-1425. doi:10.1016/j.apmr.2015.02.018

Harvard Health Publishing.What causes depression?

American Psychiatric Association.Major depressive disorder and the “bereavement exclusion”.

Francis LE, Kypriotakis G, O’Toole EE, Bowman KF, Rose JH.Grief and risk of depression in context: the emotional outcomes of bereaved cancer caregivers.Omega. 2015;70(4):351-379. doi:10.1177/0030222815573720

Assareh AA, Sharpley CF, Mcfarlane JR, Sachdev PS.Biological determinants of depression following bereavement.Neurosci Biobehav Rev. 2015;49:171-81. doi:10.1016/j.neubiorev.2014.12.013

Boelen PA, Lenferink LI.Prolonged grief disorder in DSM-5-TR: Early predictors and longitudinal measurement invariance.Aust N Z J Psychiatry. 2021;48674211025728. doi:10.1177/00048674211025728

American Psychological Association.Speaking of psychology: How grieving changes the brain, with Mary-Frances O’Connor, PhD.

Łojko D, Rybakowski JK.Atypical depression: current perspectives.Neuropsychiat Dis Treat. 2017;13:2447-2456. doi:10.2147/NDT.S147317

American Psychological Association.New paths for people with prolonged grief disorder.

Ribeiro Â, Ribeiro JP, Von Doellinger O.Depression and psychodynamic psychotherapy.Braz J Psychiatry. 2018;40(1):105-109. doi:10.1590/1516-4446-2016-2107

Grief therapy more effective for bereaved adults than psychotherapy.JAMA.2014;312(20):2083. doi:10.1001/jama.2014.15872

Szuhany KL, Malgaroli M, MironD C, Simon NM.Prolonged grief disorder: Course, diagnosis, assessment, and treatment.Focus. 2021;19(2):161-172. doi:10.1176/appi.focus.20200052

Glickman K, Shear MK, Wall M.Exploring outcomes related to anxiety and depression in completers of a randomized controlled trial of complicated grief treatment.Clin Psychol Psychother. 2014;23(2):118-124. coi:10.1002/cpp.1940

Harmer CJ, Duman RS, Cowen PJ.How do antidepressants work? New perspectives for refining future treatment approaches.Lancet Psychiatry. 2017;4(5):409-418. doi:10.1016/S2215-0366(17)30015-9

Shear MK, Reynolds III CF, Simon NM, et al.Optimizing treatment of complicated grief: A randomized clinical trial.JAMA Psychiatry. 2016;73(7):685-694. doi:10.1001/jamapsychiatry.2016.0892

American Psychological Association.How do I choose between medication and therapy?

Lyons N, Cooper C.A systematic review and meta-analysis of group peer support interventions for people experiencing mental health conditions.BMC Psychiatry.2021;21(315). doi:10.1186/s12888-021-03321-z

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At a Glance#

Defining Grief and Depression#

Why It’s Hard to Tell Depression From Grief#

Differences in Grief vs. Depression#

Diagnostic Differences#

Presentation Differences#

Treatment for Depression and Grief#

Therapy#

Medication#

Social Support#

Getting Help for Grief or Depression#