Table of ContentsView AllTable of ContentsAnxious Ambivalent Attachment and Attachment TheoryCausesCharacteristicsHow to Overcome Anxious Ambivalent AttachmentHelping Your Partner

Table of ContentsView All

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Table of Contents

Anxious Ambivalent Attachment and Attachment Theory

Causes

Characteristics

How to Overcome Anxious Ambivalent Attachment

Helping Your Partner

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This attachment style is associated with early childhood experiences where your caregiver showed inconsistent emotional availability and responsiveness toward you.

What Does It Mean to Be Emotionally Unavailable?

Psychologist Mary Ainsworth expanded on this theory, coming up with three attachment styles; researchers Main and Solomon added a fourth attachment style to the list.

Thesefour attachment stylesinclude:

Attachment theory hypothesizes that any attachment besides secure attachment can cause lifelong impacts. Children who experience insecure attachment, including anxious ambivalent attachment, may develop psychological issues and have trouble forming secure and healthy relationships later in life.

4 Types of Attachment Styles

Causes of Anxious Ambivalent Attachment

Experiences in early childhood with your parents or caretakers cause anxious ambivalent attachment.

Anxious attachment results when your caregivers are not consistent in their responsiveness and availability with you, leading to feelings of confusion,distrust, anxiety, and ambivalence. People raised this way may desire closeness to their caretakers and distance themselves from them.

What It Means if You Don’t Trust People

Characteristics of Anxious Ambivalent Attachment

People who experienced anxious ambivalent attachment growing up often end up having trouble forming intimate relationships, and may also experience mental health challenges related to their insecure attachments.

Let’s take a deeper look at how these characteristics manifest.

How Does Anxious Ambivalent Attachment Affect Relationships?

In a nutshell, being raised this way can make you feel like others can’t be trusted, and you may have a hard time committing to a relationship.

Research has found that people who grew up with fairly secure attachments are more likely to be in gratifying and committed relationships while dating and during marriage. Their relationships are less likely to be rife with conflict as well. Additionally, their relationships are more likely to last and are less likely to result in divorce.

Some studies have also found links between anxious ambivalent attachment and emotional dysregulation and psychological aggression in relationships.Other studies have noted that people who are anxiously attached are more likely to experience relationship dissatisfaction.

A 2015 study found that people who experience anxious attachment more commonly experiencejealousywhen they feel distrust towards their significant other. They are also more likely to snoop through their significant others’ things, and have an increased propensity to exhibit abusive behavior.

How Anxious Ambivalent Attachment Affects Mental Health

People who experience anxious ambivalent attachment have an increased risk of experiencing mental health difficulties like depression, low self-esteem, and emotional dysregulation.

On the other hand, research has found that securely attached people are less likely to experience signs of depression, are more likely to experience confidence, and are better able to handle stressful events that come up in life.

A 2014 study found a link between attachment insecurity and an increased likelihood of developing a negative body image and symptoms of an eating disorder.

Other research has found links between attachment insecurities and various mental health conditions such as:

If you are having suicidal thoughts, contact theNational Suicide Prevention Lifelineat988for support and assistance from a trained counselor. If you or a loved one are in immediate danger, call 911.For more mental health resources, see ourNational Helpline Database.

If you are having suicidal thoughts, contact theNational Suicide Prevention Lifelineat988for support and assistance from a trained counselor. If you or a loved one are in immediate danger, call 911.

For more mental health resources, see ourNational Helpline Database.

Understanding Suicidal Ideation and Ways to Cope

The first step inovercoming anxious ambivalent attachmentis to recognize the problem. Simply reading about the phenomenon and seeking help is wonderful and can be therapeutic in and of itself. After this, making a point to surround yourself with supportive individuals, emotionally available, and good sources of secure attachment can work wonders for your healing.

Talk therapy has been studied as a way of working through anxious ambivalent attachment. In particular, certain types of therapy are effective in managing insecure attachment.

Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT)

In cognitive behavioral therapy, you become more aware of your thoughts and feelings and how they affect your mental well-being. Studies have found that short-term.CBTis a positive way to address insecure attachment and may be particularly helpful in people who experience insecure attachment along with panic disorder.

Interpersonal Therapy

Interpersonal therapyis a type of therapy that focuses on your close relationships and how they impact your mental health. This type of therapy shows promise in treating anxious ambivalent attachment disorders.

A 2017 study found that depressed teenagers who experienced attachment anxiety and avoidance saw their symptoms significantly decrease after being treated with interpersonal therapy for 16 weeks.

Group Therapy

A 2013 study found that group therapy can be helpful for people with attachment anxiety. In particular, the study looked at people who experience adverse self-perception, trouble with emotional regulation and unhealthy relationships with others.

Types of Therapy: An A to Z List of Your Options

How Do I Help My Partner With Ambivalent Attachment?

Having a partner who deals with anxious ambivalent attachment can be challenging. It’s important to remember that this likely stemmed from when your partner was a child when life was out of their control. That said, if your partner is exhibiting harmful behavior or is having trouble committing to your relationship, it’s not something you have to simply “put up with.” It doesn’t do you any good to let unhealthy behaviors slide.

You can’t change your partner, but you can encourage them to grow and mature. One thing you can do is to be consistent in your responsiveness to them and show them what secure attachment looks like. But you can’t do it alone. Consider encouraging your partner to seek therapy. You can show them the research showing that therapy is an effective way of tackling attachment issues.

If you and your partner continue to struggle, you may considercouples counseling. Research has found that couples therapy is an effective way to manage attachment issues and can lead to more secure and satisfying relationships.

Relationship Emotions: How to Express Feelings in a Relationship

13 SourcesVerywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.Chin, K.Anxious-Ambivalent Attachment Styles. In: Zeigler-Hill V, Shackelford T, eds. Encyclopedia of Personality and Individual Differences. Springer, Cham; 2016:1-5. doi:10.1007/978-3-319-28099-8_2013-1Fraley RC, Roisman GI, Booth-LaForce C, et al.Interpersonal and genetic origins of adult attachment styles: a longitudinal study from infancy to early adulthood. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. 2013;104(5):817-838. doi:10.1037/a0031435APA Dictionary of Psychology.ambivalent attachment.Duschinsky R.The emergence of the disorganized/disoriented (D) attachment classification, 1979-1982. History of Psychology. 2015;18(1):32-46. doi:10.1037/a0038524Bosmans G, Borelli JL.Attachment and the Development of Psychopathology: Introduction to the Special Issue. Brain Sciences. 2022;12(2):174. doi:10.3390/brainsci12020174Cheche Hoover R, Jackson JB.Insecure Attachment, Emotion Dysregulation, and Psychological Aggression in Couples. Journal of Interpersonal Violence. 2021;36(19–20):NP10908–NP10936. doi:10.1177/0886260519877939Rodriguez LM, DiBello AM, Øverup CS, et al.The Price of Distrust: Trust, Anxious Attachment, Jealousy, and Partner Abuse. Partner Abuse. 2015;6(3):298-319. doi:10.1891/1946-6560.6.3.298Lev-Ari L, Baumgarten-Katz I, Zohar AH.Show Me Your Friends, and I Shall Show You Who You Are: The Way Attachment and Social Comparisons Influence Body Dissatisfaction. European Eating Disorders Review. 2014;22(6):463-469. doi:10.1002/erv.2325Mikulincer M, Shaver PR.An attachment perspective on psychopathology. World Psychiatry. 2012;11(1):11-15. doi:10.1016/j.wpsyc.2012.01.003Lange J, Goerigk S, Nowak K, et al.Attachment style change and working alliance in panic disorder patients treated with cognitive behavioral therapy. Psychotherapy. 2021;58(2):206–218. doi:10.1037/pst0000365Gunlicks-Stoesse Ml, Westervelt A, Reigstad K, et al.The role of attachment style in interpersonal psychotherapy for depressed adolescents. Psychotherapy Research. 2019;29(1):78-85. doi:10.1080/10503307.2017.1315465Marmarosh CL, Tasca GA.Adult Attachment Anxiety: Using Group Therapy to Promote Change. Journal of Clinical Psychology. 2013;69(11):1172-1182. doi:10.1002/jclp.22044Benson LA, Sevier M, Christensen A.The impact of behavioral couple therapy on attachment in distressed couples. Journal of Marital Family Therapy. 2013;39(4):407-420. doi:10.1111/jmft.12020

13 Sources

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.Chin, K.Anxious-Ambivalent Attachment Styles. In: Zeigler-Hill V, Shackelford T, eds. Encyclopedia of Personality and Individual Differences. Springer, Cham; 2016:1-5. doi:10.1007/978-3-319-28099-8_2013-1Fraley RC, Roisman GI, Booth-LaForce C, et al.Interpersonal and genetic origins of adult attachment styles: a longitudinal study from infancy to early adulthood. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. 2013;104(5):817-838. doi:10.1037/a0031435APA Dictionary of Psychology.ambivalent attachment.Duschinsky R.The emergence of the disorganized/disoriented (D) attachment classification, 1979-1982. History of Psychology. 2015;18(1):32-46. doi:10.1037/a0038524Bosmans G, Borelli JL.Attachment and the Development of Psychopathology: Introduction to the Special Issue. Brain Sciences. 2022;12(2):174. doi:10.3390/brainsci12020174Cheche Hoover R, Jackson JB.Insecure Attachment, Emotion Dysregulation, and Psychological Aggression in Couples. Journal of Interpersonal Violence. 2021;36(19–20):NP10908–NP10936. doi:10.1177/0886260519877939Rodriguez LM, DiBello AM, Øverup CS, et al.The Price of Distrust: Trust, Anxious Attachment, Jealousy, and Partner Abuse. Partner Abuse. 2015;6(3):298-319. doi:10.1891/1946-6560.6.3.298Lev-Ari L, Baumgarten-Katz I, Zohar AH.Show Me Your Friends, and I Shall Show You Who You Are: The Way Attachment and Social Comparisons Influence Body Dissatisfaction. European Eating Disorders Review. 2014;22(6):463-469. doi:10.1002/erv.2325Mikulincer M, Shaver PR.An attachment perspective on psychopathology. World Psychiatry. 2012;11(1):11-15. doi:10.1016/j.wpsyc.2012.01.003Lange J, Goerigk S, Nowak K, et al.Attachment style change and working alliance in panic disorder patients treated with cognitive behavioral therapy. Psychotherapy. 2021;58(2):206–218. doi:10.1037/pst0000365Gunlicks-Stoesse Ml, Westervelt A, Reigstad K, et al.The role of attachment style in interpersonal psychotherapy for depressed adolescents. Psychotherapy Research. 2019;29(1):78-85. doi:10.1080/10503307.2017.1315465Marmarosh CL, Tasca GA.Adult Attachment Anxiety: Using Group Therapy to Promote Change. Journal of Clinical Psychology. 2013;69(11):1172-1182. doi:10.1002/jclp.22044Benson LA, Sevier M, Christensen A.The impact of behavioral couple therapy on attachment in distressed couples. Journal of Marital Family Therapy. 2013;39(4):407-420. doi:10.1111/jmft.12020

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.

Chin, K.Anxious-Ambivalent Attachment Styles. In: Zeigler-Hill V, Shackelford T, eds. Encyclopedia of Personality and Individual Differences. Springer, Cham; 2016:1-5. doi:10.1007/978-3-319-28099-8_2013-1Fraley RC, Roisman GI, Booth-LaForce C, et al.Interpersonal and genetic origins of adult attachment styles: a longitudinal study from infancy to early adulthood. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. 2013;104(5):817-838. doi:10.1037/a0031435APA Dictionary of Psychology.ambivalent attachment.Duschinsky R.The emergence of the disorganized/disoriented (D) attachment classification, 1979-1982. History of Psychology. 2015;18(1):32-46. doi:10.1037/a0038524Bosmans G, Borelli JL.Attachment and the Development of Psychopathology: Introduction to the Special Issue. Brain Sciences. 2022;12(2):174. doi:10.3390/brainsci12020174Cheche Hoover R, Jackson JB.Insecure Attachment, Emotion Dysregulation, and Psychological Aggression in Couples. Journal of Interpersonal Violence. 2021;36(19–20):NP10908–NP10936. doi:10.1177/0886260519877939Rodriguez LM, DiBello AM, Øverup CS, et al.The Price of Distrust: Trust, Anxious Attachment, Jealousy, and Partner Abuse. Partner Abuse. 2015;6(3):298-319. doi:10.1891/1946-6560.6.3.298Lev-Ari L, Baumgarten-Katz I, Zohar AH.Show Me Your Friends, and I Shall Show You Who You Are: The Way Attachment and Social Comparisons Influence Body Dissatisfaction. European Eating Disorders Review. 2014;22(6):463-469. doi:10.1002/erv.2325Mikulincer M, Shaver PR.An attachment perspective on psychopathology. World Psychiatry. 2012;11(1):11-15. doi:10.1016/j.wpsyc.2012.01.003Lange J, Goerigk S, Nowak K, et al.Attachment style change and working alliance in panic disorder patients treated with cognitive behavioral therapy. Psychotherapy. 2021;58(2):206–218. doi:10.1037/pst0000365Gunlicks-Stoesse Ml, Westervelt A, Reigstad K, et al.The role of attachment style in interpersonal psychotherapy for depressed adolescents. Psychotherapy Research. 2019;29(1):78-85. doi:10.1080/10503307.2017.1315465Marmarosh CL, Tasca GA.Adult Attachment Anxiety: Using Group Therapy to Promote Change. Journal of Clinical Psychology. 2013;69(11):1172-1182. doi:10.1002/jclp.22044Benson LA, Sevier M, Christensen A.The impact of behavioral couple therapy on attachment in distressed couples. Journal of Marital Family Therapy. 2013;39(4):407-420. doi:10.1111/jmft.12020

Chin, K.Anxious-Ambivalent Attachment Styles. In: Zeigler-Hill V, Shackelford T, eds. Encyclopedia of Personality and Individual Differences. Springer, Cham; 2016:1-5. doi:10.1007/978-3-319-28099-8_2013-1

Fraley RC, Roisman GI, Booth-LaForce C, et al.Interpersonal and genetic origins of adult attachment styles: a longitudinal study from infancy to early adulthood. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. 2013;104(5):817-838. doi:10.1037/a0031435

APA Dictionary of Psychology.ambivalent attachment.

Duschinsky R.The emergence of the disorganized/disoriented (D) attachment classification, 1979-1982. History of Psychology. 2015;18(1):32-46. doi:10.1037/a0038524

Bosmans G, Borelli JL.Attachment and the Development of Psychopathology: Introduction to the Special Issue. Brain Sciences. 2022;12(2):174. doi:10.3390/brainsci12020174

Cheche Hoover R, Jackson JB.Insecure Attachment, Emotion Dysregulation, and Psychological Aggression in Couples. Journal of Interpersonal Violence. 2021;36(19–20):NP10908–NP10936. doi:10.1177/0886260519877939

Rodriguez LM, DiBello AM, Øverup CS, et al.The Price of Distrust: Trust, Anxious Attachment, Jealousy, and Partner Abuse. Partner Abuse. 2015;6(3):298-319. doi:10.1891/1946-6560.6.3.298

Lev-Ari L, Baumgarten-Katz I, Zohar AH.Show Me Your Friends, and I Shall Show You Who You Are: The Way Attachment and Social Comparisons Influence Body Dissatisfaction. European Eating Disorders Review. 2014;22(6):463-469. doi:10.1002/erv.2325

Mikulincer M, Shaver PR.An attachment perspective on psychopathology. World Psychiatry. 2012;11(1):11-15. doi:10.1016/j.wpsyc.2012.01.003

Lange J, Goerigk S, Nowak K, et al.Attachment style change and working alliance in panic disorder patients treated with cognitive behavioral therapy. Psychotherapy. 2021;58(2):206–218. doi:10.1037/pst0000365

Gunlicks-Stoesse Ml, Westervelt A, Reigstad K, et al.The role of attachment style in interpersonal psychotherapy for depressed adolescents. Psychotherapy Research. 2019;29(1):78-85. doi:10.1080/10503307.2017.1315465

Marmarosh CL, Tasca GA.Adult Attachment Anxiety: Using Group Therapy to Promote Change. Journal of Clinical Psychology. 2013;69(11):1172-1182. doi:10.1002/jclp.22044

Benson LA, Sevier M, Christensen A.The impact of behavioral couple therapy on attachment in distressed couples. Journal of Marital Family Therapy. 2013;39(4):407-420. doi:10.1111/jmft.12020

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