7 Things to Do if You Feel Emotional

Table of ContentsView AllTable of ContentsIdentify Your FeelingsDetermine if Your Emotions are HelpfulTry Out Healthy Coping SkillsEmbrace How You’re FeelingReframe Unhelpful ThoughtsAct HappyGet Professional HelpNext in Small Ways to Feel Better When You’re Depressed Guide7 Things to Do When You Are Feeling Unappreciated

Table of ContentsView All

View All

Table of Contents

Identify Your Feelings

Determine if Your Emotions are Helpful

Try Out Healthy Coping Skills

Embrace How You’re Feeling

Reframe Unhelpful Thoughts

Act Happy

Get Professional Help

Next in Small Ways to Feel Better When You’re Depressed Guide

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Intense emotions can be tough to deal with. Whether you’re feeling intenseanger, fear, or sadness,emotion regulation skillscan help reduce the intensity and duration of those uncomfortable feelings.

The next time you’re feeling painful emotions, these seven strategies can help.

Identify How You’re Feeling

Putting a name to what you’re feeling can help you make sense of youremotions. Thinking something like, “I’m anxious right now,” or “I’m really disappointed,” can help you clarify what’s going on for you.

Studies show that labeling an emotion takes some of the sting out of it. So simply identifying your emotion might help you feel a little better right away.

You might simply think about what you’re feeling and try to name it. Or, you might write in a journal to help you make sense of things. You also might find that talking to someone and labeling your emotions aloud helps you feel better.

How to Journal When You Have Uncomfortable Emotions

Determine if Your Emotions Are Helpful or Unhelpful

Sometimes, people talk about feelings like they’re either good or bad. But emotions aren’t either positive or negative. All feelings can be helpful or unhelpful.

Consider howanxietycan be either helpful or harmful:

Similarly, anger can be helpful if it gives you the courage to create positive change. It’s unhelpful if it causes you to say or do things you later regret.

If your emotions are helpful, you might want to embrace them. If your emotions are unhelpful, you can take steps to manage them.

Experiment With Healthy Coping Skills

Healthy coping skillshelp you get through tough emotions without numbing them, suppressing them, or ignoring them. They may temporarily distract you a bit so you can feel better, or they might help calm your body or boost your mood.

The coping strategies that work for one person might not work for another, so it’s important to find the coping skills that work best for you. Examples of healthy coping skills might include:

Be on the lookout for unhealthy coping skills that may introduce new problems into your life or make you feel worse over time. Drinking alcohol,using drugs, or overeating are just a few examples of coping skills that might help you feel better temporarily but will create bigger problems for your life in the long term.

Get Advice From the The Verywell Mind PodcastThis episode ofThe Verywell Mind Podcastshares how you can learn to tolerate uncomfortable emotions.

Get Advice From the The Verywell Mind Podcast

This episode ofThe Verywell Mind Podcastshares how you can learn to tolerate uncomfortable emotions.

Sometimes, sitting with an uncomfortable emotion is the best thing you can do. That may mean acknowledging andacceptingwhat you’re experiencing and then going through your daily routine anyway.

You might notice that you’re sad or anxious and decide to continue working on a project, or you might even take a break just to pay attention to what you’re experiencing.

When you feelangry, for example, your thoughts might stay focused on the negative aspect of a situation. You might also experience physiological reactions, like an increase in heart rate.

Simply noticing those things without judging yourself can be helpful.If you start thinking, “I shouldn’t feel this way,” remind yourself that it’s OK to feel whatever you’re feeling and that the feeling is only temporary. Eventually, it will pass. You are not a bad person for having feelings.

How to Embrace Radical Acceptance

Be on the lookout for unhelpful thoughts that fuel your uncomfortable emotions. Thinking things like, “I can’t stand this!” or “I know something bad is going to happen” will only make you feel worse.

When you catch yourself thinking unhelpful thoughts, take a minute toreframe them. You might develop a simple phrase to repeat to yourself like, “This is uncomfortable but I’m OK.”

You also might ask, “What would I say to a friend who had this problem?” You might find you’d offer them kind, compassionatewords of encouragement. Try offering yourself those same kind words.

Self-Compassion Makes Life More Manageable

Act As If You Feel Happy

While it’s helpful to embrace uncomfortable emotions for a little while sometimes, you also don’t want to stay stuck in them. Feeling really sad for too long or feeling really angry might keep you stuck in a dark place.

Rather than sitting on the couch doing nothing when you feel sad, you might ask yourself, “What would I be doing right now if I felthappy?” Maybe you’d go for a walk or call a friend. Hold your head up with your shoulders back. Do those things now, even though you don’t feel like it.

Researchers have also found that smiling—even when it is forced or fake—can help induce a more positive mood.

You might find that changing your behavior changes how you feel. It is a positive feedback loop. Acting as if you felt better might help you start feeling better.

Happy Crying: Why Does It Happen?

You can alsoreach out to a licensed mental health professional. Difficulty managing your emotions may be a sign of an underlying mental health issue, like anxiety or depression.talk therapy, medication, or a combination of the two can help.

The Best Online Therapy ProgramsWe’ve tried, tested and written unbiased reviews of the best online therapy programs including Talkspace, Betterhelp, and Regain.

Final Thoughts

It’s OK to be an emotional person. Crying when you watch movies (even commercials), feeling passionate about things you love, and getting angry over social injustice are all signs that you’re human—not red flags that you need help.

Being emotional only becomes a problem when it creates dysfunction in your life. If your emotions make it difficult to havehealthy relationships, stay productive at work, or succeed in school, you may benefit from some of the strategies mentioned or professional help.

7 Things to Do When You Are Feeling Unappreciated

6 SourcesVerywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.Torre JB, Lieberman MD.Putting feelings into words: Affect labeling as implicit emotion regulation.Emotion Review. 2018;10(2):116-124. doi:10.1177/1754073917742706.Lebel RD.Moving beyond fight and flight: A contingent model of how the emotional regulation of anger and fear sparks proactivity.Acad Manage Rev. 2016;42(2):190-206. doi:10.5465/amr.2014.0368Smith MM, Saklofske DH, Keefer KV, Tremblay PF.Coping strategies and psychological outcomes: The moderating effects of personal resiliency.J Psychol. 2016;150(3):318-332. doi:10.1080/00223980.2015.1036828Troy AS, Shallcross AJ, Brunner A, Friedman R, Jones MC.Cognitive reappraisal and acceptance: Effects on emotion, physiology, and perceived cognitive costs.Emotion. 2018;18(1):58-74. doi:10.1037/emo0000371Clark DA.Cognitive restructuring. In: Hofmann SG, Dozois D, eds.The Wiley Handbook for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy,First Edition. John Wiley & Sons, Ltd; 2013. doi:10.1002/9781118528563.wbcbt02Marmolejo-Ramos F, Murata A, Sasaki K, et al.Your face and moves seem happier when I smile.Exp Psychol. 2020;67(1):14-22. doi:10.1027/1618-3169/a000470

6 Sources

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.Torre JB, Lieberman MD.Putting feelings into words: Affect labeling as implicit emotion regulation.Emotion Review. 2018;10(2):116-124. doi:10.1177/1754073917742706.Lebel RD.Moving beyond fight and flight: A contingent model of how the emotional regulation of anger and fear sparks proactivity.Acad Manage Rev. 2016;42(2):190-206. doi:10.5465/amr.2014.0368Smith MM, Saklofske DH, Keefer KV, Tremblay PF.Coping strategies and psychological outcomes: The moderating effects of personal resiliency.J Psychol. 2016;150(3):318-332. doi:10.1080/00223980.2015.1036828Troy AS, Shallcross AJ, Brunner A, Friedman R, Jones MC.Cognitive reappraisal and acceptance: Effects on emotion, physiology, and perceived cognitive costs.Emotion. 2018;18(1):58-74. doi:10.1037/emo0000371Clark DA.Cognitive restructuring. In: Hofmann SG, Dozois D, eds.The Wiley Handbook for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy,First Edition. John Wiley & Sons, Ltd; 2013. doi:10.1002/9781118528563.wbcbt02Marmolejo-Ramos F, Murata A, Sasaki K, et al.Your face and moves seem happier when I smile.Exp Psychol. 2020;67(1):14-22. doi:10.1027/1618-3169/a000470

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.

Torre JB, Lieberman MD.Putting feelings into words: Affect labeling as implicit emotion regulation.Emotion Review. 2018;10(2):116-124. doi:10.1177/1754073917742706.Lebel RD.Moving beyond fight and flight: A contingent model of how the emotional regulation of anger and fear sparks proactivity.Acad Manage Rev. 2016;42(2):190-206. doi:10.5465/amr.2014.0368Smith MM, Saklofske DH, Keefer KV, Tremblay PF.Coping strategies and psychological outcomes: The moderating effects of personal resiliency.J Psychol. 2016;150(3):318-332. doi:10.1080/00223980.2015.1036828Troy AS, Shallcross AJ, Brunner A, Friedman R, Jones MC.Cognitive reappraisal and acceptance: Effects on emotion, physiology, and perceived cognitive costs.Emotion. 2018;18(1):58-74. doi:10.1037/emo0000371Clark DA.Cognitive restructuring. In: Hofmann SG, Dozois D, eds.The Wiley Handbook for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy,First Edition. John Wiley & Sons, Ltd; 2013. doi:10.1002/9781118528563.wbcbt02Marmolejo-Ramos F, Murata A, Sasaki K, et al.Your face and moves seem happier when I smile.Exp Psychol. 2020;67(1):14-22. doi:10.1027/1618-3169/a000470

Torre JB, Lieberman MD.Putting feelings into words: Affect labeling as implicit emotion regulation.Emotion Review. 2018;10(2):116-124. doi:10.1177/1754073917742706.

Lebel RD.Moving beyond fight and flight: A contingent model of how the emotional regulation of anger and fear sparks proactivity.Acad Manage Rev. 2016;42(2):190-206. doi:10.5465/amr.2014.0368

Smith MM, Saklofske DH, Keefer KV, Tremblay PF.Coping strategies and psychological outcomes: The moderating effects of personal resiliency.J Psychol. 2016;150(3):318-332. doi:10.1080/00223980.2015.1036828

Troy AS, Shallcross AJ, Brunner A, Friedman R, Jones MC.Cognitive reappraisal and acceptance: Effects on emotion, physiology, and perceived cognitive costs.Emotion. 2018;18(1):58-74. doi:10.1037/emo0000371

Clark DA.Cognitive restructuring. In: Hofmann SG, Dozois D, eds.The Wiley Handbook for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy,First Edition. John Wiley & Sons, Ltd; 2013. doi:10.1002/9781118528563.wbcbt02

Marmolejo-Ramos F, Murata A, Sasaki K, et al.Your face and moves seem happier when I smile.Exp Psychol. 2020;67(1):14-22. doi:10.1027/1618-3169/a000470

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