Close

Whilesmall talk, typically casual and lighthearted, can help break the ice, it may not necessarily help you form a deep, emotional bond with someone. Whether it’s with yourfriends, family members, colleagues, or romantic partners, having meaningful conversations is important in order to create strong bonds.

“Meaningful conversations help us understand ourselves and the people around us better. They involve sharing important aspects of ourselves, and actively listening to, validating, and connecting with others,” saysSabrina Romanoff, PsyD, a clinical psychologist and professor at Yeshiva University.

In this article, we share some tips to help you have meaningful conversations and someconversation startersto keep handy for different types of situations.

30 Questions to Engage Someone Beyond ‘How Are You?’

Meaningful Conversations vs. Small Talk

These are some of the differences between meaningful conversations and small talk, according to Dr. Romanoff.

Meaningful ConversationsDeepEmotionalInvolve complex thoughtRequire vulnerabilityOnly with a select few close peopleBuild emotional bonds and strong relationshipsCasual Small TalkLightheartedCasual and funDoesn’t need much effortShields vulnerabilitiesCan be with just about anyoneEstablishes common ground and sets the stage for deeper connections

Meaningful ConversationsDeepEmotionalInvolve complex thoughtRequire vulnerabilityOnly with a select few close peopleBuild emotional bonds and strong relationships

Deep

Emotional

Involve complex thought

Require vulnerability

Only with a select few close people

Build emotional bonds and strong relationships

Casual Small TalkLightheartedCasual and funDoesn’t need much effortShields vulnerabilitiesCan be with just about anyoneEstablishes common ground and sets the stage for deeper connections

Lighthearted

Casual and fun

Doesn’t need much effort

Shields vulnerabilities

Can be with just about anyone

Establishes common ground and sets the stage for deeper connections

Tips for Dealing With Awkward Conversations

How to Have a Meaningful Conversation

Dr. Romanoff shares some tips that can help you have a meaningful conversation with someone:

Sabrina Romanoff, PsyDOpening up to someone and modeling the type of meaningful conversation you hope to have is a great way to help make them feel emotionally safe and willing to do the same.

Sabrina Romanoff, PsyD

Opening up to someone and modeling the type of meaningful conversation you hope to have is a great way to help make them feel emotionally safe and willing to do the same.

Deep Conversation Starters for Meaningful Connections

These are some deep conversation starters that can help you have meaningful conversations with people.

10 Conversation Starters That Can Help You Get to Know Someone Better

These are some conversation starters that can help youget to know someone better:

20 Conversation Starters About Love and Relationships

These are some conversation starters that can help you have a meaningful conversation aboutlove and relationships:

10 Conversation Starters About Dreams, Wishes, and Values

These are some conversation starters that can help you have a meaningful conversation about wishes, dreams, andvalues:

10 Conversation Starters About Childhood and Upbringing

These are some conversation starters that can help you have a meaningful conversation about childhood and upbringing:

Relationship Questions to Ask Your Partner to Take Your Connection Next Level

You may feel nervous about trying to initiate deep conversations with a friend, loved one, or someone you don’t know very well just yet, but learning more about them—and allowing them to learn more about you—is a great way to deepen your connection and build the kind of intimacy that helps sustain relationships over the long-term. The more you learn, and the more you share about yourself, the easier it will be to have more intimate conversations in the future without feeling uncomfortable.

2 SourcesVerywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.Connor Desai S, Reimers S.Comparing the use of open and closed questions for web-based measures of the continued-influence effect.Behav Res Methods. 2019;51(3):1426-1440. doi:10.3758/s13428-018-1066-zJonsdottir IJ, Kristinsson K.Supervisors' active-empathetic listening as an important antecedent of work engagement.Int J Environ Res Public Health. 2020;17(21):7976. doi:10.3390/ijerph17217976

2 Sources

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.Connor Desai S, Reimers S.Comparing the use of open and closed questions for web-based measures of the continued-influence effect.Behav Res Methods. 2019;51(3):1426-1440. doi:10.3758/s13428-018-1066-zJonsdottir IJ, Kristinsson K.Supervisors' active-empathetic listening as an important antecedent of work engagement.Int J Environ Res Public Health. 2020;17(21):7976. doi:10.3390/ijerph17217976

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.

Connor Desai S, Reimers S.Comparing the use of open and closed questions for web-based measures of the continued-influence effect.Behav Res Methods. 2019;51(3):1426-1440. doi:10.3758/s13428-018-1066-zJonsdottir IJ, Kristinsson K.Supervisors' active-empathetic listening as an important antecedent of work engagement.Int J Environ Res Public Health. 2020;17(21):7976. doi:10.3390/ijerph17217976

Connor Desai S, Reimers S.Comparing the use of open and closed questions for web-based measures of the continued-influence effect.Behav Res Methods. 2019;51(3):1426-1440. doi:10.3758/s13428-018-1066-z

Jonsdottir IJ, Kristinsson K.Supervisors' active-empathetic listening as an important antecedent of work engagement.Int J Environ Res Public Health. 2020;17(21):7976. doi:10.3390/ijerph17217976

Meet Our Review Board

Share Feedback

Was this page helpful?Thanks for your feedback!What is your feedback?HelpfulReport an ErrorOtherSubmit

Was this page helpful?

Thanks for your feedback!

What is your feedback?HelpfulReport an ErrorOtherSubmit

What is your feedback?