5 Signs Your Child's Behavior Is Out of Control

Table of ContentsView AllTable of ContentsFrequent and Severe OutburstsInterpersonal ProblemsDifficulty Controlling EmotionsPoor Impulse ControlSerious Behavior IssuesHow to RespondWhen to Seek Help

Table of ContentsView All

View All

Table of Contents

Frequent and Severe Outbursts

Interpersonal Problems

Difficulty Controlling Emotions

Poor Impulse Control

Serious Behavior Issues

How to Respond

When to Seek Help

Close

It isn’t uncommon for parents to occasionally feel that their children’s behavior is out of control. After all, most kids experience temper tantrums, rule-breaking, or other behavioral challenges from time to time.

In many cases, such behavioral issues can signify that a child’s needs are not being met or that they are dealing with something stressful. Sometimes, however, these problems might indicate a more seriousbehavioral disorderor emotional problem.

This article discusses how to tell if your child’s behavior is out of control and what steps you can take to help your child. Recognizing that there might be a problem and taking steps to improve your child’s behavior can lead to better outcomes.

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Temper tantrums are normal among younger children but decrease in frequency and severity as they age. If your child is still experiencing frequent and severe temper tantrums past the age of five, it may be a sign that they are experiencing a behavioral issue.

Behaviors that are sometimes viewed as out of control when they occur in older children include:

Such tantrums are often in response to stress or unmet desire. Kids might engage in such behavior when they don’t get what they want or when they want attention from others. Outbursts can also occur in response to being tired, hungry, or frustrated.

These outbursts are usually relatively brief, and most kids gradually outgrow them once they start school. If your child experiences longer-lasting, violent outbursts or continue to have tantrums past age five, it may be a sign of a behavioral issue.

Difficulty With Interpersonal Relationships

Another sign that your child’s behavior might be out of control is having frequent interpersonal issues with other children and adults.

Common problems you might notice include the following:

These social problems can leave kids feeling isolated and take a serious toll onself-esteem.

Problems Managing Emotions

Another problem associated with out-of-control behavior in children is difficulty managing emotions. Whileyounger kids struggle more with emotional control, this is an ability that gradually improves as children get older.

On the other hand, kids who experienceemotional dysregulationhave a more challenging time understanding and controlling their own emotional responses.

Emotional Dysregulation

Signs of emotional dysregulation in kids include:

How to Deal With Dysregulation

Kids with out-of-control behavior may struggle to manage their impulses effectively. They may engage in actions without considering the consequences, leading to social, academic, or disciplinary problems.

Examples ofimpulsive behaviorsthat can cause problems include:

Impulsivitycan lead to many problems in your child’s life. But when your child is out of control, impulsive behaviors can be dangerous.In such cases, it can be helpful to encourage your child to cool down, help them identify and name what they are feeling, and then talk about appropriate ways to deal with the problem.

Serious Behavioral Problems

Out-of-control behavior can often be more severe and lead to significant consequences. Examples of these behaviors can include:

Such behavior patterns might indicate a behavioral disorder, such asoppositional defiant disorder(ODD) orconduct disorder(CD). ODD is usually between around age eight and no later than age 12. Conduct disorder may begin before age 10, but it is often diagnosed during adolescence.

In addition to contributing to social and academic issues, these severe behavior problems can lead to disciplinary and legal issues. In some instances, such behavior can threaten the health and safety of the child or others around them. If your child exhibits such behaviors, it is essential to talk to a doctor and take steps to help them get the treatment they need.

What to Do If Your Child’s Behavior Is Out of Control

If you feel like your child’s behavior is out of control, there are steps that you can take to improve your child’s behavior. For many behavioral issues, effective parenting strategies can help caregivers get a handle on behavioral challenges.

Some strategies that can help improve children’s behavior include:

If disciplinary and parenting strategies don’t seem to be working or if your child’s behavior poses a risk to others or themselves, it is essential to talk to a professional. Talking to your child’s pediatrician is an excellent place to start. They can recommend treatments or refer you to other professionals for assessment, advice, and treatment.

Treatment for behavioral issues may includepsychotherapy, behavioral interventions, parent education, and medication. Joining aparent support groupcan also be a great source of information, advice, and encouragement.

Summary

Parents may feel that their children’s behavior is out of control on occasion, but most kids experience temper tantrums, rule-breaking, or other behavioral challenges from time to time. In many cases, such behavioral issues can signify that a child’s needs are not being met or that they are dealing with something stressful. Sometimes, however, these problems might indicate a more serious behavioral disorder.

Signs of out-of-control behavior include frequent and severe tantrums; difficulty with interpersonal relationships; poor impulse control; and serious behavioral problems like rule-breaking, bullying, and self-harm. If you feel your child’s behavior is out of control, establish clear household rules, create structure in the home, offer reinforcement for good behavior, and seek help from a professional if necessary.

A Word From Verywell

Out-of-control behavior in children can be cause for concern, but most of the time, it can be addressed with consistent and positive parenting. If your child’s behavior escalates beyond what you can manage,seek professional help. With the proper support and guidance, parents can help their children learn to regulate their own behavior more effectively.

5 Signs Your Child’s Behavior Is Out of Control

9 SourcesVerywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.Ogundele MO.Behavioural and emotional disorders in childhood: A brief overview for paediatricians.World J Clin Pediatr. 2018;7(1):9-26. doi:10.5409/wjcp.v7.i1.9American Academy of Pediatrics.Developmental milestones: 4 to 5 year olds.Bakhshani NM.Impulsivity: a predisposition toward risky behaviors.Int J High Risk Behav Addict. 2014;3(2):e20428. doi:10.5812/ijhrba.20428Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.Behavior or conduct problems in children.Gleason MM, Goldson E, Yogman MW.Addressing early childhood emotional and behavioral problems.Pediatrics. 2016;138(6). doi:10.1542/peds.2016-3025Jaffee SR, Hanscombe KB, Haworth CM, Davis OS, Plomin R.Chaotic homes and children’s disruptive behavior: a longitudinal cross-lagged twin study.Psychol Sci. 2012;23(6):643–650. doi:10.1177/0956797611431693National Academies of Sciences, Engineering, and Medicine; Division of Behavioral and Social Sciences and Education; Board on Children, Youth, and Families; Committee on Supporting the Parents of Young Children; Breiner H, Ford M, Gadsden VL, editors.Parenting Knowledge, Attitudes, and Practices. In:Parenting Matters: Supporting Parents of Children Ages 0-8Bombi AS, Di Norcia A, Di Giunta L, Pastorelli C, Lansford JE.Parenting practices and child misbehavior: A mixed method study of Italian mothers and children.Parent Sci Pract. 2015;15(3):207–228.Coelho LF, Barbosa DL, Rizzutti S, Muszkat M, Bueno OF, Miranda MC.Use of cognitive behavioral therapy and token economy to alleviate dysfunctional behavior in children with attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder.Front Psychiatry. 2015;6:167. doi:10.3389/fpsyt.2015.00167

9 Sources

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.Ogundele MO.Behavioural and emotional disorders in childhood: A brief overview for paediatricians.World J Clin Pediatr. 2018;7(1):9-26. doi:10.5409/wjcp.v7.i1.9American Academy of Pediatrics.Developmental milestones: 4 to 5 year olds.Bakhshani NM.Impulsivity: a predisposition toward risky behaviors.Int J High Risk Behav Addict. 2014;3(2):e20428. doi:10.5812/ijhrba.20428Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.Behavior or conduct problems in children.Gleason MM, Goldson E, Yogman MW.Addressing early childhood emotional and behavioral problems.Pediatrics. 2016;138(6). doi:10.1542/peds.2016-3025Jaffee SR, Hanscombe KB, Haworth CM, Davis OS, Plomin R.Chaotic homes and children’s disruptive behavior: a longitudinal cross-lagged twin study.Psychol Sci. 2012;23(6):643–650. doi:10.1177/0956797611431693National Academies of Sciences, Engineering, and Medicine; Division of Behavioral and Social Sciences and Education; Board on Children, Youth, and Families; Committee on Supporting the Parents of Young Children; Breiner H, Ford M, Gadsden VL, editors.Parenting Knowledge, Attitudes, and Practices. In:Parenting Matters: Supporting Parents of Children Ages 0-8Bombi AS, Di Norcia A, Di Giunta L, Pastorelli C, Lansford JE.Parenting practices and child misbehavior: A mixed method study of Italian mothers and children.Parent Sci Pract. 2015;15(3):207–228.Coelho LF, Barbosa DL, Rizzutti S, Muszkat M, Bueno OF, Miranda MC.Use of cognitive behavioral therapy and token economy to alleviate dysfunctional behavior in children with attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder.Front Psychiatry. 2015;6:167. doi:10.3389/fpsyt.2015.00167

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.

Ogundele MO.Behavioural and emotional disorders in childhood: A brief overview for paediatricians.World J Clin Pediatr. 2018;7(1):9-26. doi:10.5409/wjcp.v7.i1.9American Academy of Pediatrics.Developmental milestones: 4 to 5 year olds.Bakhshani NM.Impulsivity: a predisposition toward risky behaviors.Int J High Risk Behav Addict. 2014;3(2):e20428. doi:10.5812/ijhrba.20428Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.Behavior or conduct problems in children.Gleason MM, Goldson E, Yogman MW.Addressing early childhood emotional and behavioral problems.Pediatrics. 2016;138(6). doi:10.1542/peds.2016-3025Jaffee SR, Hanscombe KB, Haworth CM, Davis OS, Plomin R.Chaotic homes and children’s disruptive behavior: a longitudinal cross-lagged twin study.Psychol Sci. 2012;23(6):643–650. doi:10.1177/0956797611431693National Academies of Sciences, Engineering, and Medicine; Division of Behavioral and Social Sciences and Education; Board on Children, Youth, and Families; Committee on Supporting the Parents of Young Children; Breiner H, Ford M, Gadsden VL, editors.Parenting Knowledge, Attitudes, and Practices. In:Parenting Matters: Supporting Parents of Children Ages 0-8Bombi AS, Di Norcia A, Di Giunta L, Pastorelli C, Lansford JE.Parenting practices and child misbehavior: A mixed method study of Italian mothers and children.Parent Sci Pract. 2015;15(3):207–228.Coelho LF, Barbosa DL, Rizzutti S, Muszkat M, Bueno OF, Miranda MC.Use of cognitive behavioral therapy and token economy to alleviate dysfunctional behavior in children with attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder.Front Psychiatry. 2015;6:167. doi:10.3389/fpsyt.2015.00167

Ogundele MO.Behavioural and emotional disorders in childhood: A brief overview for paediatricians.World J Clin Pediatr. 2018;7(1):9-26. doi:10.5409/wjcp.v7.i1.9

American Academy of Pediatrics.Developmental milestones: 4 to 5 year olds.

Bakhshani NM.Impulsivity: a predisposition toward risky behaviors.Int J High Risk Behav Addict. 2014;3(2):e20428. doi:10.5812/ijhrba.20428

Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.Behavior or conduct problems in children.

Gleason MM, Goldson E, Yogman MW.Addressing early childhood emotional and behavioral problems.Pediatrics. 2016;138(6). doi:10.1542/peds.2016-3025

Jaffee SR, Hanscombe KB, Haworth CM, Davis OS, Plomin R.Chaotic homes and children’s disruptive behavior: a longitudinal cross-lagged twin study.Psychol Sci. 2012;23(6):643–650. doi:10.1177/0956797611431693

National Academies of Sciences, Engineering, and Medicine; Division of Behavioral and Social Sciences and Education; Board on Children, Youth, and Families; Committee on Supporting the Parents of Young Children; Breiner H, Ford M, Gadsden VL, editors.Parenting Knowledge, Attitudes, and Practices. In:Parenting Matters: Supporting Parents of Children Ages 0-8

Bombi AS, Di Norcia A, Di Giunta L, Pastorelli C, Lansford JE.Parenting practices and child misbehavior: A mixed method study of Italian mothers and children.Parent Sci Pract. 2015;15(3):207–228.

Coelho LF, Barbosa DL, Rizzutti S, Muszkat M, Bueno OF, Miranda MC.Use of cognitive behavioral therapy and token economy to alleviate dysfunctional behavior in children with attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder.Front Psychiatry. 2015;6:167. doi:10.3389/fpsyt.2015.00167

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