15 Tips For Better Flirting, According to Relationship Experts

Table of ContentsView AllTable of ContentsWhat Makes Good Flirting?Flirting Tips to Boost Attraction and ConnectionThings to Remember

Table of ContentsView All

View All

Table of Contents

What Makes Good Flirting?

Flirting Tips to Boost Attraction and Connection

Things to Remember

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Being attracted to someone can be exciting and intimidating all at once. If you like them, you may wonder what to say or do around them in the hopes of getting them to like you back.

That’s whereflirtingcomes in. Although it can sometimes seem superficial, flirting is an important aspect of human behavior.

Flirting is the human language ofattractionthat conveys interest and desirability toward another, saysClarissa Silva, a behavioral scientist, relationship coach, and creator of ‘Your Happiness Hypothesis Method.’

Besides, flirting involves exciting, playful interactions that can boost your confidence and self-esteem, saysClaudia de Llano, LMFT, a licensed marriage and family therapist.

Although flirting is as old as humankind, flirting techniques and what’s considered appropriate have changed dramatically over time. Verywell Mind asked relationship experts what makes for good flirting and to share some tips that can help you step up your flirting game.

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These are some of the ingredients that make for good flirting:

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These are some tips that can help you step up your flirting game:

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While flirting comes naturally to some people, it can be a lot harder for some. Putting yourself out there and riskingrejectioncan definitely be scary.

It can be helpful to observe people who are good at it, either in real life or on screen. You can also practice it on a friend or someone you’re attracted to in a group setting, to take some of the pressure off.

Be courageous and don’t be afraid of being imperfect, says Silva. She recommends having fun and giving yourself permission to express your feelings, no matter the outcome.

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6 SourcesVerywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.Horn S, Matuszewska N, Gkantidis N, Verna C, Kanavakis G.Smile dimensions affect self-perceived smile attractiveness.Sci Rep. 2021;11(1):2779. doi:10.1038/s41598-021-82478-9Apostolou M, Papadopoulou I, Christofi M, Vrontis D.Mating performance: assessing flirting skills, mate signal-detection ability, and shyness effects.Evol Psychol. 2019;17(3):1474704919872416. doi:10.1177/1474704919872416Wade JA.(I think) you are pretty: a behavior analytic conceptualization of flirtation.Perspect Behav Sci. 2018;41(2):615-636. doi:10.1007/s40614-018-0136-yHaj-Mohamadi P, Gillath O, Rosenberg EL.Identifying a facial expression of flirtation and its effect on men.J Sex Res. 2021;58(2):137-145. doi:10.1080/00224499.2020.1805583Lykens J, Pilloton M, Silva C, Schlamm E, Wilburn K, Pence E.Google for sexual relationships: Mixed-methods study on digital flirting and online dating among adolescent youth and young adults.JMIR Public Health Surveill. 2019;5(2):e10695. doi:10.2196/10695La France BH.“Don’t get your meat where you get your bread”: Beliefs and advice about workplace romance.Behav Sci (Basel). 2022;12(8):278. doi:10.3390/bs12080278

6 Sources

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.Horn S, Matuszewska N, Gkantidis N, Verna C, Kanavakis G.Smile dimensions affect self-perceived smile attractiveness.Sci Rep. 2021;11(1):2779. doi:10.1038/s41598-021-82478-9Apostolou M, Papadopoulou I, Christofi M, Vrontis D.Mating performance: assessing flirting skills, mate signal-detection ability, and shyness effects.Evol Psychol. 2019;17(3):1474704919872416. doi:10.1177/1474704919872416Wade JA.(I think) you are pretty: a behavior analytic conceptualization of flirtation.Perspect Behav Sci. 2018;41(2):615-636. doi:10.1007/s40614-018-0136-yHaj-Mohamadi P, Gillath O, Rosenberg EL.Identifying a facial expression of flirtation and its effect on men.J Sex Res. 2021;58(2):137-145. doi:10.1080/00224499.2020.1805583Lykens J, Pilloton M, Silva C, Schlamm E, Wilburn K, Pence E.Google for sexual relationships: Mixed-methods study on digital flirting and online dating among adolescent youth and young adults.JMIR Public Health Surveill. 2019;5(2):e10695. doi:10.2196/10695La France BH.“Don’t get your meat where you get your bread”: Beliefs and advice about workplace romance.Behav Sci (Basel). 2022;12(8):278. doi:10.3390/bs12080278

Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.

Horn S, Matuszewska N, Gkantidis N, Verna C, Kanavakis G.Smile dimensions affect self-perceived smile attractiveness.Sci Rep. 2021;11(1):2779. doi:10.1038/s41598-021-82478-9Apostolou M, Papadopoulou I, Christofi M, Vrontis D.Mating performance: assessing flirting skills, mate signal-detection ability, and shyness effects.Evol Psychol. 2019;17(3):1474704919872416. doi:10.1177/1474704919872416Wade JA.(I think) you are pretty: a behavior analytic conceptualization of flirtation.Perspect Behav Sci. 2018;41(2):615-636. doi:10.1007/s40614-018-0136-yHaj-Mohamadi P, Gillath O, Rosenberg EL.Identifying a facial expression of flirtation and its effect on men.J Sex Res. 2021;58(2):137-145. doi:10.1080/00224499.2020.1805583Lykens J, Pilloton M, Silva C, Schlamm E, Wilburn K, Pence E.Google for sexual relationships: Mixed-methods study on digital flirting and online dating among adolescent youth and young adults.JMIR Public Health Surveill. 2019;5(2):e10695. doi:10.2196/10695La France BH.“Don’t get your meat where you get your bread”: Beliefs and advice about workplace romance.Behav Sci (Basel). 2022;12(8):278. doi:10.3390/bs12080278

Horn S, Matuszewska N, Gkantidis N, Verna C, Kanavakis G.Smile dimensions affect self-perceived smile attractiveness.Sci Rep. 2021;11(1):2779. doi:10.1038/s41598-021-82478-9

Apostolou M, Papadopoulou I, Christofi M, Vrontis D.Mating performance: assessing flirting skills, mate signal-detection ability, and shyness effects.Evol Psychol. 2019;17(3):1474704919872416. doi:10.1177/1474704919872416

Wade JA.(I think) you are pretty: a behavior analytic conceptualization of flirtation.Perspect Behav Sci. 2018;41(2):615-636. doi:10.1007/s40614-018-0136-y

Haj-Mohamadi P, Gillath O, Rosenberg EL.Identifying a facial expression of flirtation and its effect on men.J Sex Res. 2021;58(2):137-145. doi:10.1080/00224499.2020.1805583

Lykens J, Pilloton M, Silva C, Schlamm E, Wilburn K, Pence E.Google for sexual relationships: Mixed-methods study on digital flirting and online dating among adolescent youth and young adults.JMIR Public Health Surveill. 2019;5(2):e10695. doi:10.2196/10695

La France BH.“Don’t get your meat where you get your bread”: Beliefs and advice about workplace romance.Behav Sci (Basel). 2022;12(8):278. doi:10.3390/bs12080278

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